Curled up on the couch, I just read It’s Not Easy Being a Bunny to my three-year-old. I paused after reading a page and asked her, “What animal says, ‘Moo?’” She replied, “A pig?”

It’s not easy being Child #3.

If you’ve managed to break the 1.8-2.2 family size mold, you know what I’m talking about.

  • #1 has Olan Mills portraits of every stage of development, arranged nicely in a scrapbook.
  • #2 has a few Wal-Mart Fun Photo Studio pictures; one of them is hanging on the wall.
  • #3 has some pictures on a digital camera, waiting to be downloaded.
  • And #4…well, we’ll just remember what she looks like.

    It’s not easy being Child #3 (or #4).

    Now, I’m not worried about my kids assimilating pithy information like, say, cow sounds, because they manage to learn things that they find useful. For example, I overheard my boy telling his little sister the other day that the reason the ball didn’t go very far was not because he had a weak arm, but because of friction.

    (We teach all of our kids to take personal responsibility.)

    I remember my husband singing the Hebrew alphabet and reciting the nine times tables to our first newborn. Yes, we were raising a genius, and there was no time to waste. Nevertheless, all our kids are smarter than the average bear, unless you consider cow sounds important to intelligence, but they’re far from the Einsteins we were expecting. But, we’re not disappointed in the least.

    As I’m typing this, muffin #3—who is delinquent in cow sounds– is singing,

    Ho, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the waters, and he that hath no money; come ye, buy, and eat. Come ye to the waters, he hath no money, Isaiah 55, 1, come ye buy and eat.

    I’m feeling better about my failure in the mammal noise department, but sometimes being a mother can be rough on your conscience.

    • Yeah, It’s Not Easy Being a Bunny or Child #3, but well, she’s doing a pretty good job at it.

    Even if she’s a little behind with the animal sounds.