My seven-year-old son is the oldest of his three sisters. He generally functions in a caretaker-protector role, except in the case with his closest-in-age sibling. He is a boy, and he likes to wrestle. #2 in the lineup is a girl and very much like her mother, so she enjoys a good scrap.

This is all fine—until someone gets hurt.

So, I watched on as my Braveheart-in-training yanked his five-year-old sister off the couch by her leg, and she wailed. She was probably more distressed that she had lost the battle than for her physical well-being. She’s like her mother in that way. (Except Mama doesn’t cry; she gets even.) Even still, my son was out-of-line with his brutality, and so my husband pulled him aside and gave him The Talk.

As I watched on, I realized that what would be required of my son is that he gain wisdom—wisdom to know what was appropriate and when, wisdom to assess the situation and act accordingly, and wisdom to adjust his behavior when circumstances change. We can not give him a list of appropriate maneuvers applicable to each sister, or later, to each circumstance. No, he must learn to be wise.

Every evening during family devotions, each of our children pray and ask God for wisdom. As a mother, I see the parallel of needing wisdom for my task at hand. My own list of maneuvers varies for each child and circumstance, as one rule will not apply to every situation. So I, like my son, continue in my learning, gaining, and asking for wisdom.

Blessed is the man who finds wisdom,
the man who gains understanding,
for she is more profitable than silver
and yields better returns than gold.
Proverbs 3:13-14