Of worry and comfort
Tuesday, Jan 31, 2006
I’ve been thinking of a way to alienate the male readership a little more, so I thought I’d shift gears to some baby talk. It’s almost criminal that the midwives moved my due date two weeks back—as in, further away– but my husband insists that we’ll have a mid-February baby anyway. If he’s correct, remember that you heard it here first; if he’s wrong, try not to think about what they did to false prophets in the Old Testament.
The older ladies in the church are worried that I won’t make it to February, let alone March 3rd. Let’s just say that the maternity clothes are shrinking. Very strange.
I try not to hold a myopic view of life. This means I realize that while we’re having some exciting times here, not everyone, everywhere shares our joy and circumstance. But, it’s time to hunker down. (Sorry for the slang phrase; too much TV during last year’s hurricanes.) It’s time to focus, take inventory, wash the car seat….and think of a name!
So, of course, I have The Baby Radar on. I like to gawk at newborns, reread labor techniques, and research herbs that might help me have my first pitocin-free delivery. I scroll Baby Name websites late at night. I also enjoy exchanging birth stories with mom’s at the park and talking to my older kids about who-is-going-to-be-in-charge of (fill-in-the-blank). And when it is all quiet, sometimes I think about how and if it is all going to be OK.
In Love Has a Price Tag, Elisabeth Elliot writes, “Ever since the Garden of Eden was sullied by evil it has been an unhappy and an unstable world. Has it ever been right to bring a child into such a world? For the Christian it is right–a thousand times right. For it is the will of God that married people accept the responsibility of children. It is the will of God that we live in the world–this world of light and darkness, of gladness and suffering–for it is this world that Jesus Christ came to redeem. Christianity, alone among the religions of the world, looks steadfastly at the facts, whatever they may be, and says there is an ultimate explanation, an ultimate purpose, a glorious answer.”
That answer, of course, is found in the Cross. This is our hope. Isaiah 40:11 assures, He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young.
This, this is the victory of the grave;
here is death’s sting,
that it is not strong enough,
our strongest wing
But what of His who like a Father pitieth?
His Son was also, once, a little thing….
~Charlotte Mew
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Amy - I’m so happy to have those last few weeks over with, so I can really empathize. The bigger you get, the harder it is and the slower time seems to move. Isn’t it funny how women go through that final stage where we just kind of turn inward and can’t seem to focus on anything but baby and getting ready for him/her. By the way, I’m considering praying for you to have a(nother) girl - future potential mate for my Jack:)
Comment by Shannon Miller (January 31, 2006 @ 3:19 pm )
I had a February baby . . . he was 9 days late and born on February 26. I suggest that as a perfect date for having a baby! (Forty-three hours of labor, born at home. Perfect all the way around!)
Comment by Mel (January 31, 2006 @ 3:21 pm )
False prophets, oh my! I needed a laugh today and that sure provided one!
Thank you also for your focus on Christ. Even in the midst of my not so great day, he is still our hope and comfortor. Thanks for the reminder.
Comment by Emily (January 31, 2006 @ 6:26 pm )
Amy–
There’s nothing like the last few weeks of pregnancy to make you feel like everything in life is up for grabs! I sympathize. I never wanted to be induced, but twice I had to be, for the baby’s health (a super-rare Rh-like situation), and the one consoling factor was that it was so nice to know WHEN THIS BABY’S COMING! But the other four times…I’ve been there.
I was gone, to my grandmother’s funeral, and just read your Margaret Sanger posts–just great. I have to share that while at the funeral, I was told a story I’d never heard before–that my grandmother heard a speaker and became convicted in this very area of birth control: it would have been mid-40’s. (I wrote up the whole story in my blog here I would love to know who that speaker was! But it seems like in every generation God keeps sending voices to speak up for Him–thanks for doing so so eloquently.
Comment by At A Hen's Pace (January 31, 2006 @ 8:07 pm )
Oh, yes, that is criminal to change your due date….by two weeks!!?? You just don’t DO that to a woman in her last weeks!
It’s going to be ok. You just keep goin’ to the cross.
Comment by Andrea (January 31, 2006 @ 8:58 pm )
Oh stop being so deep and philosophical, Amyyyyyyy! Just talk about baby stuff already.
We all love it.
Hang in there!
Comment by Holly (January 31, 2006 @ 9:24 pm )
For the sake of the non-american, what is pitocin? My baby was born in Feb, and no one was too sure of my due date It was so annoying when people kept asking as I didn’t know how to answer. However, he made his induced entry to theis world on Feb 2nd….he will be one tommorrow!
Thinking of you (p.s,The name I had chossen for a boy was used by the only other mum of child bearing age in my church 6 weeks before my baby was born. Talk about back to the drawing board. We still hadn’t decided when he arrived!)
Comment by Susanna (February 1, 2006 @ 4:54 am )
Today, we are celebrating my baby’s birthday…she’s 9 already! Her name is Noelle, which tells you when she was supposed to be born! ;o) After a premie and an early baby, she came LATE! But the birth was wonderful. The others had been sooooo long, hers was 5 hours from start to finish, no pushing, no pitocin (first time ever!) Ironically, after she was born, I started hemmoraging, and they gave me pitocin! Argh! I didn’t know anything about herbs back then. Oh well.
Praying you have a wonderful delivery, and that it’s sooner than they think!
Comment by Leni (February 1, 2006 @ 8:57 am )
Amy, thank you so much for posting this quote. What a wonderful perspective wake-up call!
Our youngest (number 4) was born 13 days late last Feb. 28 at 11:51 p.m. My entire labor was 45 minutes long–talk about being meant to be a Feb. baby!
Our other three children were 6 days late. God has convinced me they will be born on His appointed day!
Praying for you,
Wendy
Comment by wendy (February 1, 2006 @ 9:33 am )
Wendy:
You’re so right! Children are born on God’s appointed day not ours or anyone else’s. He showed us this loud and clear with our youngest 11 years ago. The due date was Dec. 23. And we were, in our foolish wisdom, thinking this was just to close to the holidaying, so we were “standing in faith” that the babe would be early, like beginning of December. Seeing our first two were born right on their due dates, our doc thought we lost our minds. Needless to say the 23rd came & went and then our prayer desperately turned to “after Christmas, Lord. We’re standing in faith”. Lo, and behold, Christmas morning right after present opening, when hubby was trying out his new waffle maker, the Lord with a chuckle I’m sure let us know it was time. Her birthdate, December 25 at 12 noon! God does have a sense of humor and kindly let us know He is still in charge!
Comment by Susanne (February 1, 2006 @ 11:23 am )
I can sooo remember that last weeks of pregnancy. I have always been “late”, with my children being 8 days, 11 days, and 6 days past my due date. I always had ptiocin, and wanted a different experience with my current baby. He was born at home without pitocin, 12 days past my due date. It was the most amazing experience to feel what “regular” labor felt like. I hope to be able to experience it again!
I will be praying for your comfort to increase and that you will be able to go into labor and deliver your baby without using any pitocin!
Comment by Rebekah (February 1, 2006 @ 3:56 pm )
Beautiful quote by Eliot. Raising children is a courageous act.
Susanna,
Pitocin is a drug, given through an IV, that induces labor.
Comment by Leslie (February 1, 2006 @ 4:46 pm )
I, too, know what you are feeling, Amy. My eldest was 8 days late (but was breech and was a c-section. So who knows when she would have eventually appeared). Our second was 18 days late and our third was 12 days late. I had pitocin with the last two because I have very loooooonnnggg labors (38 hrs and 34 hrs recpectfully) and the medical people wanted to speed things up. I’m indending with this one, now that I know what real labor feelings like, to not leav our house until I’m on my knees (whether in pain or prayer, I’m not sure)! With our second, I recieved an epideral (due to the fact that it had been so long and nothing was working) before the contractions became strong. She was out with in an hour of the epideral. With our son, I actually felt the contractions really bad (the pit made them come in a triple effect), but it had been 33 hours already and I was exhausted! He was still very high and I was at 3cm. So I got an epideral and within a hour, he was out! Sunnyside up and over baked!
My due date is June 27, but I’ll be having a July baby (a boy I think). The second week in July is my guess. We’ll see.
Hang in there and try to remember there are those of us who really do understand what you are feeling ~ emotionaly, physically, mentally….. (my apologies about my bad spelling. You can tell what will be one of my weak spots with homeschooling).
Jennifer
Comment by Jennifer D (February 1, 2006 @ 4:54 pm )
Oh Amy . . . .I sure feel with you. I remember with my twins, my doctor said I would go 3-6 weeks EARLY. I was supposed to be in my sister-in-law’s wedding but decided not to be a bridesmaid in case early “arrivals” would change her wedding plans. Well, my twins were born the day before their due date. I was jumping down 3 or 4 steps at a time - every and anything to get these babes out. But it was God’s timing for these healthy babies. They were 7 lbs and 7 lbs 3 oz. They are now 14 years old, and my extra set of hands!
The last weeks are so hard - the unknown - the what if’s - and something we women just cannot “plan” into our schedule! But, it’s written on God’s calendar.
It will be wonderful to hear your news!
Loni
Comment by Loni (February 1, 2006 @ 10:35 pm )
Hi Amy!
I had to pipe up because you failed to alienate me (male readership). This is a great subject and one that is dear to my heart. Cindy and I are having our fifth child late summer! I delivered all 4 four so far (2 at home) and am looking forward to more. Children are indeed a blessing from the Lord! All of our births have been pitocin-free thanks to blue and black cohash. Our son Isaiah was considered to be 5 weeks late (hence I had to deliver him in the hospital). We would not take Pitocin, the fundal (sp?) height was 39 cm. Cohash got the birth going. After the birth they said he was actually 1 week early. Let me know if you want the info on how to get what we used.
I am so happy for you on your upcoming birth. My family will be praying for you that your birth goes well…and pitocin-free :-).
Jesse
Comment by Jesse (February 2, 2006 @ 10:40 am )
Congratulations, Jesse, on your new little one. I’m taking the Polly Jean Five Week Formula, which contains blue cohash, but not black. Let me know if there’s something better. Let me know if you all are planning on the FPEA convention this year.
Comment by Amy Scott (February 2, 2006 @ 2:43 pm )
Congratulations to Shannon, too, as just having her son last month! In the words of my friend, Valerie, “Yea, babies, yea!”
Comment by Amy Scott (February 2, 2006 @ 2:48 pm )
I’m always late too. I have never gone into labor by myself excepting the first one. But I always take castor oil and both the cohashes mentioned. A little rough on the digestion, but a little easier for the labor.
Comment by kerri (February 2, 2006 @ 4:46 pm )
I have been taking the 5W, until I went to the Polly Jean site and read something like this…”Slows down precipitous labors.” WHAT? My labors are fast…I don’t want to slow them down! I just wanted the part that everyone talked about…the labor was so much easier!!!!!
Comment by Holly (February 2, 2006 @ 9:18 pm )
Susanne
So funny you mention your baby being born on Christmas and you least expect it.
My fourth baby was just born this past year on October 31st. He was a week late. None of mine have ever been that late. The Lord KNEW his appointed time. So hard to remember in those last weeks, though.
Comment by Andrea (February 2, 2006 @ 9:25 pm )
I don’t want to overalert or overreact but feel a warning of prayerful consideration be made if any are using the “5-W” product in particular. I used this product with two of my children. You are suppose to start it 5 weeks before the baby is due. With the first baby I used with this, our baby was born close to 3 weeks early. She was the only baby my water broke on it’s own.
With the baby born after this I also used the 5-W. She was stillborn, just 5 days after beginning this. I did not know I had high blood pressure. The cohoshes should not be taken if you have high blood pressure. Cohoshes should be used to start labor and get it going more - not earlier. I had a placenta abruption. I was on my way to taking another daughter for a doctor’s visit, thankfully, right next to the hospital. Had I not been that close to the hospital, I would not have lived either. I thought I was having normal contractions on the way to the office. Once I got in the office, I suddenly began to hemmorhage.
This was over 8 years ago, and I have since learned of other women who have also had problems with the 5-W including the loss of a little one as well. I have heard of other women having bad cramps, and when they stopped taking the 5-W, it stopped.
I am not at all familiar with the Polly Jean formula, but seeing the 5-W mentioned here, felt the need to give a warning with it. With any herbs and/or medicines, check up on them - know what they do. Watch your body. You may react differently. Most of all be prayerful. God has the day appointed for little ones to be born - with or without the 5-W!
Comment by Loni (February 2, 2006 @ 9:38 pm )
Thank you, Amy!
We use Shonda Parker’s StartUp formula. We never use it unless we want the baby to come out now. It is a stimulant, so the heart concern (with high blood pressure) is a valid one. I’ll have to leave it up to you to compare to Polly Jean as I have never looked at that one. We also used Red Rasberry tea to ripen the cervix–definitely no danger at all with that. Shonda has some other formulas that are very helpful with births as well. ContractEaze is a must-have to greatly reduce the pain of the intense contractions after birth (uterus collapsing). Placenta-Out is also extremely effective–we always wait for the placenta to birth on its own as pulling it out causes damage to the uterus as well as extra bleeding. I hope this information is helpful to you.
I was not aware of this convention, but I’ll look into it. Your family could stay in one of our vacation rentals while there–we are just over an hour from Kissimmee.
Bye for now,
Jesse
Comment by Jesse (February 3, 2006 @ 7:42 am )
We have two in our class due this week. It’s so exciting to watch email every day, looking to see if either of the babes have come yet.
Comment by My Boaz's Ruth (February 17, 2006 @ 12:35 am )
Hello Amy,
I just stumbled on this blog - very late I know - but after reading all the posts about being “over due” I just had to clear this up: normal pregnancy lasts from 37 to 42 weeks of pregnancy. “Over due” is more than 42 completed weeks of pregnancy. Even then I would be skeptical unless you’re 100% sure of your date of conception, especially if the pregnancy was dated using ultrasound — notoriously off by up to +/- 3 weeks!
Greetings from Alberta, Canada
Comment by Geri Lehner, RM (November 11, 2006 @ 2:16 pm )