Becoming men
Monday, Feb 20, 2006
Everyone should experience the joy of a seven-year-old boy who likes magic tricks, catching bugs, and telling jokes. I remember dreaming of the day that I’d finally be able to have a conversation with my kids. You know, something beyond, “Do you want your cup? Oh? Say, ‘Please.’ You’re such a good boy.”
This weekend, my son flopped on my bed crosswise, and asked, “Where do dogs go for a rest? [Pause for effect.] A barking lot! Get it, Mom? A barking lot?!” Yes, we’ve come so far. I love him.
I was in a hurry the other day and found the closet door jammed open and blocking my path due to Hungry, Hungry Hippos being logged in the fold. I cursed muttered under my breath, wondering if I was cut out for motherhood for the long haul. (Sometimes, I’m dramatic.) The marbles were spilled all over the floor, and so were the ones in my head. I couldn’t manage my nine-month pregnant form around the door, so I heaved my hand in blindly as I grasped for plastic hippos and small white marbles. The dented box was hardly worth salvaging, but I rigged it enough to hold all the treasures.
As I cleaned up, I recalled my son in his suit just a couple weeks earlier. He helped my husband collect the offering in church. Beforehand, he and my husband practiced how to collect, time, and get the plates synchronized. It’s a science, I tell you. My son was up and dressed in his suit a few hours early for the big day. (A son’s quiet eagerness is something special that wives and husbands get to share and muse over behind closed doors.) He was so handsome in his suit and serious expression, clues that he was to embark on a weighty task.
Then, from my view from the piano bench, I caught a glimpse of his tennis shoes, all scuffed up. My husband and I leave for church at different times, and this escaped my notice that morning. Gelled hair, straight tie, ironed shirt…and dirty sneakers! I don’t have adult children, but I wonder if I will see and consider him like this when he’s older—tall, handsome, and important, but still wearing scruffy sneakers and a joke book in his back pocket.
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Amy, that’s a great question. I wonder what mothers of adult children will say?
I’m finding that I LOVE having kids that are getting older. My oldest three are now 15, 13 and almost 11 and I do relate to them differently than I do to the younger three who are 7 and under. Their personalities are more pronounced, their opinions are fresh and interesting, their problems are discussable!
I don’t really think of the little boy or girl they once were as much as I relate to the person they are and are becoming. It is a bittersweet thing to watch them grow up so fast…mostly sweet though. Like flowers unfolding.
What a privilege to raise them!
Comment by Anonymous (February 20, 2006 @ 3:33 pm )
That was me, actually–I didn’t mean to be anonymous.
Comment by At A Hen's Pace (February 20, 2006 @ 3:36 pm )
You will see him that way, hopefully everyday. My oldest just turned 17 recently, and I still view him as the little boy falling off his train when he was 2 saying Ho ho ……hooooooo as he fell.
The best part about him growing into the man he is fast becoming, is that we have much more in common. Feels like me and my father all over again.
Comment by Todd (February 20, 2006 @ 3:39 pm )
what a cutie! i had my first boy a year ago. he is so different from the girls and i love him so much. i can’t wait to see what he becomes.
Comment by melissa (February 20, 2006 @ 4:44 pm )
Amy, I loved this post. As a mother of three boys, 23, 21 and 14, and a one year old grandson, I can tell you that it is PURE JOY to see the residual little boy in the man. One son came home from college ready for a nostalgic journey. He lay on his tummy in the back yard one morning and shot a BB gun, playing like a….wittle boy. Next thing you know, the back yard neighbor is ringing our doorbell, asking if I know how a BB made it through their sliding patio door. Ahh, some things never change! So much for sentimental journeys!
Comment by Carol in Oregon (February 20, 2006 @ 5:04 pm )
What a face!!! Thanks for nudging the memories of my own boys at that age. Oi…and now one is 24, and the twins, nearly 22…I do have a couple of grandsons in that wonderful “goonbird” stage to keep me smilin’ still.
(BTW…. my twins weighed in at 18 lbs 3 oz altogether…one was 10 and a half lbs. Let’s just say it was uncomfortable.) :o)
…praying for a safe delivery for you, friend.
Comment by Dawn (February 20, 2006 @ 7:15 pm )
The oldest of my 4 is just 4 himself and is finally entering into the “discussion” stage, although his jokes are still only funny to a limited audience. I LOVE it! I need to keep a journal of things he says because I know my fleeting brain will forget them, and I want to remember his naivete while it’s still harmless. Thanks for sharing! You painted a PERFECT picture of boyness.
Comment by covenantmama (February 20, 2006 @ 9:03 pm )
sweet!
Comment by Holly (February 20, 2006 @ 9:33 pm )
Such a beautiful thought. I love it because my “baby” brother always had a huge foot and it was hard (until he got in high school) to find dress shoes to fit him. (Not many dress shoes in size 18 and this was when he was 12!) He would always wear his basketball shoes to church…even if he was wearing a suit.
It was terribly endearing.
I hope that’s the way you remember your son when he is grown. It is a very pleasant thing to think about…and so innocent and little boyish!
Thanks for this sweet little tribute to your little man. It has made me smile!
Comment by Bethany (February 20, 2006 @ 10:10 pm )
That is so precious Amy. There’s just something about the innocent and adventurous nature of a young boy.
Comment by Meredith B. (February 21, 2006 @ 7:47 am )
I have a 20 year old who has always been grown up, far more than his own Mom will ever be. But last Sunday at church, he arrived with his hair sticking up in the back and had to be given a comb. (He slept late, having worked very late closing the store.)
My almost 18 year old is almost as cuddly as he was at two, I always know he is good for hugs and kisses and he always senses when Mom just needs to talk.
I sure love my men, and though their baby pictures are adorable, I wouldn’t trade their manly current-selves for their sweet adorable past-babiness!
Then again, if I get lonely for that, there is always another possible adoption around the corner!:-)
Comment by Margaret in VA (February 21, 2006 @ 9:35 am )
he is a real cutie. the word picture is one that seems like a “classic boy” to me. i know one doesn’t really exist, just as the classic girl doesn’t. i had 3 girls–each plenty feminine but very unique. they will range from 29-35 this year by the time b’days are over. we’ll also add 2 more grandchildren to our one with the coming of our first grandson. i look forward to having a little boy in the family for variety as well as the sweet, lively and usually talkative little girls. what fun to watch these little grandchildren (unfortunately, we have to do it from a distance) as well as our covenant family at church as they grow and develop physically and spiritually.
martha
Comment by martha (February 21, 2006 @ 10:44 am )
i’m reading through your past entries because that’s what i do. if a blog interests me enough to come back i want to know the person i’m reading about so i read them all. i’m up to june 2005. don’t tell me what’s going to happen next. though, sneak peak on the home page tells me you’re going to have a baby any minute.
your writing is so interesting and enjoyable. you really have your head on straight, so to speak.
i hope things go well with the delivery and maybe i’ll be up to speed by the time you have given birth.
Comment by melissa (February 22, 2006 @ 1:35 am )
I can just imagine that boy up and down the aisles at church. With that smile, I’ll be not too many noticed the sneakers. My only son with 4 sisters is 21. He didn’t own too many dress shoes growing up so usually tried to have him in a clean pair of sneakers. Today he owns more shoes than any of sisters-a lot of them dress shoes. He is meticulous about them. His hair on the other hand, he likes to wear it messy and a bit wild, even when he is all dressed for church.
Comment by Joanne (February 22, 2006 @ 1:10 pm )
We do tend to focus on the details of life don’t we. Sweet musings.
Comment by Kelly (February 22, 2006 @ 4:51 pm )
Ok, I have never commented on a blog before. I just enjoy reading them in the very few moments I have between subjects as I homeschool my 8 year old son. But I found you through Challies and had to say thanks.
As for joke books, my 5 almost 6 year old son won’t put his down and has many a time launched into his own “hilarious” version of a joke that really makes no sense at all. Those are the moments I want to remember.
That said, his philosopher-self is emerging through his “jokes” as his latest went like this . . .
son: Knock-knock
mom: Who’s their?
son: Be patient
mom: Be patient who?
son: Be patient, and you’ll know me. (big smile and then walks away)
I am thanking my God for joke books today. By the way, how on earth do you find time to blog anyway?
Comment by Kamrin (February 22, 2006 @ 5:33 pm )
I asked my dad this a while back. He says he sees the “little girl” in me all the time. The older I get the more I realize what a priviledge growing old is. So many never get to be the age where looking back is possible. I must say, I’m looking forward it.
Comment by Spunky (February 22, 2006 @ 8:07 pm )
I can picture the dirty sneekers! Very typical. My older teen boys still do this. (”No one will look at my shoes mom!”) Thanks for sharing!
Comment by Loni (February 23, 2006 @ 2:52 pm )
Big welcome to new readers, Kamrin and Melissa. Thanks for stopping by.
Ack! Someone called me a real blogger?
I post during naptime…if I’m not napping. You can always tell what stage of pregnancy I’m in by the frequency of posts.
Comment by Amy Scott (February 23, 2006 @ 3:34 pm )
Emma (5yo) loves telling knock-knock jokes.
Comment by Ron (February 23, 2006 @ 5:44 pm )
What is it about those Hungry,Hungry, Hippos…they get everywhere, don’t they!
{{{Candleman}}}
Comment by Candleman (February 25, 2006 @ 10:13 pm )