Elliot on Motherhood and Profanity
Monday, May 15, 2006
I’ve been reading Elisabeth Elliot since I turned 16. There is one message that weaves itself in all her words—Jesus message, “My life for yours.” It is a good message because it is a Biblical message. One doesn’t need be a mother to appreciate Elliot’s words on the subject of “Motherhood and Profanity”:
But what have buying groceries, changing diapers and peeling vegetables got to do with creativity? Aren’t those the very things that keep us from it? Isn’t it that kind of drudgery that keeps us in bondage? It’s insipid and confining, it’s what one conspicuous feminist called “a life of idiotic ritual, full of forebodings and failure.” To her I would answer ritual, yes. Idiotic, no, not to the Christian–for although we do the same things anybody else does, and we do them over and over in the same way, the ordinary transactions of everyday life are the very means of transfiguration. It is the common stuff of this world which, because of the Word’s having been “made flesh,” is shot through with meaning, with charity, with the glory of God.
But this is what we so easily forget. Men as well as women have listened to those quasi-rational claims, have failed to see the fatal fallacy, and have capitulated. Words like personhood, liberation, fulfillment and equality have had a convincing ring and we have not questioned their popular definitions or turned on them the searchlight of Scripture or even of our common sense. We have meekly agreed that the kitchen sink is an obstacle instead of an altar, and we have obediently carried on our shoulders the chips these reductionists have told us to carry.
This is what I mean by profanity. We have forgotten the mystery, the dimension of glory. It was Mary herself who showed it to us so plainly. By the offering up of her physical body to become the God-bearer, she transfigured for all mothers, for all time, the meaning of motherhood. She cradled, fed and bathed her baby–who was very God of very God–so that when we cradle, feed and bathe ours we may see beyond that simple task to the God who in love and humility “dwelt among us and we beheld his glory.”
Those who focus only on the drabness of the supermarket, or on the onions or the diapers themselves, haven’t an inkling of the mystery that is at stake here, the mystery revealed in the birth of that Baby and consummated on the Cross: my life for yours.
The routines of housework and of mothering may be seen as a kind of death, and it is appropriate that they should be, for they offer the chance, day after day, to lay down one’s life for others. Then they are no longer routines. By being done with love and offered up to God with praise, they are thereby hallowed as the vessels of the tabernacle were hallowed–not because they were different from other vessels in quality or function, but because they were offered to God. A mother’s part in sustaining the life of her children and making it pleasant and comfortable is no triviality. It calls for self-sacrifice and humility, but it is the route, as was the humiliation of Jesus, to glory.
To modern mothers I would say “Let Christ himself be your example as to what your attitude should be. For he, who had always been God by nature, did not cling to his prerogatives as God’s equal, but stripped himself of all privilege by consenting to be a slave by nature and being born as a mortal man. And, having become man, he humbled himself by living a life of utter obedience, even to the extent of dying, and the death he died was the death of a common criminal. That is why God has now lifted him so high. . .” (Phil. 2:5-11 Phillips).
It is a spiritual principle as far removed from what the world tells us as heaven is removed from hell: If you are willing to lose your life, you’ll find it. It is the principle expressed by John Keble in 1822:
If on our daily course our mind
Be set to hallow all we find,
New treasures still, of countless price,
God will provide for sacrifice.
24 Comments
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I don’t know much about mothering, but that’s an excellent use of capitalization in the post title!
Comment by Andy Crouch (May 15, 2006 @ 9:22 pm )
The reason Motherhood and Profanity are capitalized is because it is a title. Don’t think for a second that I switched methods. Old habits die hard.
But I’ll accept the compliment anyway before you take it back.
Comment by Amy Scott (May 15, 2006 @ 9:33 pm )
Awesome.
I went online to cure my insomnia, but now I have *more* to think about. In the future I’ll avoid your blog when I can’t sleep
Comment by mopsy (May 16, 2006 @ 5:11 am )
I’m not a mom, but the points she raises are universal… as Christians our paradox privilege is that our glory is in serving, especially the kind of serving that goes unnoticed by others - God notices. Thanks for this post, I love Elisabeth Elliott too!
Comment by singlemindedly (May 16, 2006 @ 6:14 am )
Thanks for sharing. I’ve come to the point of submitting to the fact that I have to do dishes. God could provided for us all like He did the Israelites, no Tupperware required or allowed!
Is there a book where the “Motherhood & Purity” essay is found?
Comment by Lexie (May 16, 2006 @ 8:17 am )
One of my friends, who also has a blog, just named her daughter after Elisabeth Elliot.
Comment by Leslie (May 16, 2006 @ 8:22 am )
This is the grace that God has given to me-to do the wash, the dishes, to be the kisser of booboos. It is what He uses to chisel at my character and to conform it to His.
Comment by Laurie (May 16, 2006 @ 10:45 am )
Thank you for this message today, Amy. It is JUST what I needed to hear.
Blessings to you and yours.
Comment by Nancy B (May 16, 2006 @ 10:52 am )
Ya know? I think naming a future daughter after Elisabeth is an excellent idea. I have only recently discovered her books, but want to buy each one I can get my hands on soon! (have read a bunch but they belong to a friend)
Comment by Lyn (May 16, 2006 @ 11:38 am )
I hope I don’t step on any toes here…but after reading this it made me think of something I’ve always pondered and never come to a definate conclusion about.
Churches & running daycares/childcare.
Many churches have daycare programs through the week. Granted, there is a huge need for GOOD Christ-centered childcare for the children whose parents both choose to work. I’m not refuting that.
But as a church should we be in the daycare business or in the business of supporting full-time motherhood? Just curious…still don’t know how I think/feel about it. Or maybe I do, and I’m scared to voice it!!!
Comment by Lindsey (May 16, 2006 @ 12:18 pm )
It’s those “common things” that make us want to find “fulfillment” elsewhere. Thanks for the encouragement to find the “mystery and glory” in them! I’m heading to the altar–I mean, my sink–now.
Comment by Katherine (May 16, 2006 @ 12:54 pm )
Very good…I love Elisabeth Elliot’s writings…they’ve somewhat spoiled me for some other authors whose works don’t have the same depth. Which book is that from? I thought I might’ve remembered reading something similar in “Keep a Quiet Heart”, but I could be wrong…
Comment by Jessica (May 16, 2006 @ 1:47 pm )
I love Elisabeth Elliot too. I love what this says.
My question is–how do you set the example of service and dying to yourself while, at the same time, teaching your children to respect and honor you? This has been my dilemma since the beginning. When I selflessly serve them, their tendency is to take me for granted and adopt an entitlement attitude. When I try to teach them to be respectful and responsible, I feel like I am being selfish. I honestly don’t mind peeling their carrots and folding their socks, or even scrubbing the toothpaste out of their sink, but I would feel better if they didn’t seem to believe that I owe it to them.
Comment by ruth (May 16, 2006 @ 3:20 pm )
Love Has a Pricetag
As much as possible, any job that can be done by a kid, we assign it to them. With a family, there is always plenty more to do, plenty of ways a mother can/needs to serve.
Sounds like they need more work (assuming you have their hearts). Even when the kids get the rote cleaning jobs, there will always be sheets to change in the middle of the night (by mom), oversight and management (by mom), and the training of doing these tasks (by mom). Don’t feel selfish; instead, feel glad that you are preparing them for a life that is God-honoring.
Comment by Amy Scott (May 16, 2006 @ 4:38 pm )
Sorry to be so dense…but Love Has a Pricetag is the book where the “Motherhood & Profanity” essay that you quoted from is found? I looked on Amazon and they didn’t have anything under that name…?
Comment by Jessica (May 16, 2006 @ 7:21 pm )
Here it is. (price tag is 2 words…sorry–the fault is mine!)
Comment by Amy Scott (May 16, 2006 @ 7:32 pm )
You have no idea how much I needed to read this entry! God spoke through you today to encourage me and remind me of the high calling of being a momma!
Thank you! I actually wrote more about your entry on my blog!
Comment by Good, bad and ugly (May 16, 2006 @ 8:19 pm )
Thank you…added it to my “Wishlist”! And as for the “price tag” part…that’s fine, I should’ve thought about it and not given up so easily! Have a glorious day!
Comment by Jessica (May 16, 2006 @ 8:51 pm )
Elisabeth Elliot is also a must read for every man as well!
Comment by Scott (May 17, 2006 @ 1:09 pm )
Hi Amy. I have just started reading your Blog…I am enjoying it hugely! I live in Australia and getting certain Christian books is difficult. I am looking to import Love Has a Price Tag. Can you tell me if there is much difference between the 1979 edition and the 2005 edition?
Comment by Rachael (May 18, 2006 @ 3:02 am )
I’m guessing it’s a reprint; I don’t know of any difference. Welcome, Rachael, and thanks for reading.
Ai, ai.
Comment by Amy Scott (May 18, 2006 @ 7:04 pm )
There is something I have always wanted to say about the supposed “drudgery” of home work. Just what do feminists want us to trade our work at home for?–for drudgery at the factory or office, working like a slave for someone else, for their goals and their dreams and their ambitions.
Sure, at the end of the week or month a woman might receive a paycheck, but even that is filled with reminders that what she earned doesn’t even belong to her; it belongs to the federal government, the babysitter, McDonald’s, etc.
When I wash my dishes and wipe my baby’s bottom, I can do it with heart because I CARE about the people I am doing these things for.
I have been out in that big, bad world full of “potential”, and I wouldn’t trade it for my humble trip to the grocery store–not in a million!
Comment by Sherry (May 21, 2006 @ 11:10 am )
so how do you ladies grapple with the story of martha and mary?
Comment by Anonymous (May 21, 2006 @ 5:34 pm )
I don’t think this is a dichotomy. Scripture tells us to “work and pray.” The story of Mary and Martha is a reminder to keep things balanced, to choose our priorities well.
Those are my quick thoughts. Any others are welcome.
Comment by Amy Scott (May 22, 2006 @ 3:16 pm )