Obvious correlations
Thursday, Dec 14, 2006
It’s not my general habit to quote Oprah type personalities (lest I be accused of eating bon bons), but this gem from Maya Angelou is too good, “I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.”
If I were famous and people hung on my every word, I’d phrase it like this, “I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a guy by the way he treats his mother, what he does when he loses, and how he reacts to getting cut off in traffic.” On the flip side, I think you can tell a lot about a lady by how long she takes to get ready, what the inside of her microwave looks like, and if she regifts.
I haven’t always known these things, and I’m sure I’m still missing a few obvious insights. However, I just know things about women who paint their toes odd colors. And people who refer to themselves as “creative”? They aren’t early risers. Men who are able to use “affect” and “effect” properly and interchangeably have orderly sock drawers. I know all about these sorts of things.
Fortunately, I lucked out anyway when I married my husband, because I still had a lot to learn when I was 19. For starters, sadly, Greg’s mom had passed away from cancer two years before we met. I never met her or saw how Greg treated her. Secondly, after knowing Greg for 12 years, I’ve never seen him lose anything. He came home after taking the GRE and said, “I think I missed one.” (He was right.) It’s tough being married to an over-achiever, especially when you wish you were one yourself. And thirdly, I can’t tell how he reacts to getting cut off because my ranting is too loud to hear his commentary.
In case you were wondering, I can be presentable in 5 minutes, my microwave is clean, and I don’t regift. Obviously, the dichotomies are troubling, but I didn’t claim this was a perfect system.
45 Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI
Leave a comment
What a halarious post! I was laughing. I appreciate your transparency about all the imperfect moments in life. It’s very refreshing - I can take a sigh of relief and know I’m not the only one who feels this way at times.
Comment by Sarah (December 14, 2006 @ 2:09 pm )
OH NO! You posted again - I meant to comment (in the above comment I just wrote) on your post about taking the 74 pictures of your kids! I’ll go post my comment on the correct one, ok? Maybe you can delete these comments here since I messed up…it’s kind of embaressing.
Comment by Sarah (December 14, 2006 @ 2:11 pm )
So, regifting — is it thrifty or cheap? Hmm, sounds like a blog post! Off to my blog . . .
Comment by Gem (December 14, 2006 @ 2:31 pm )
Amy - your kids are beautiful! Your many shots were worth it - that one is awesome!
I can so relate to your frustration in trying to get a good picture of them! We spent a few hours at a local photo studio last week and let’s just say…I wouldn’t advise trying to have holiday pictures taken when everybody has a cold, the young one is tired and cranky, the dog is hot, tired, slobbering and has a terrible case of gas!!
Comment by Lisa (December 14, 2006 @ 2:56 pm )
Your children are are adorable. I have only 2 little one, but getting a picture where they are both looking at the camera and smiling is something that is very close to a miracle.
I have to admit that I have regifted. We got so many nice things when we got married and had doubles of quite a bit. When we had our first child and went to one income those extra gifts in the closet were life-savers.
Comment by Claire Weaver (December 14, 2006 @ 5:08 pm )
Hmmm - I can get ready in about five minutes if no shower is required, otherwise twenty. I have no microwave and I absolutely regift. So what does that say about me?
Comment by Megan (December 14, 2006 @ 5:57 pm )
The secret of re-gifting is to make sure it doesn’t cross family or friend lines. What is worse? Re-gifting, taking up closet space, or giving it to a thrift store?
Comment by a. borealis (December 14, 2006 @ 5:58 pm )
I only misuse affect and effect for affect.
And there’s not much order to my sock drawer.
Comment by Jeff (December 14, 2006 @ 8:51 pm )
Ahem.
A disorderly sock drawer does not mean (necessarily) that a man is untidy. It may mean that his wife is too stinkin’ busy with seven children to put his socks away properly, so she just throws ‘em in the drawer.
The same goes for a woman’s microwave. See - in a perfect world, my microwave would be sparkling. That’s my “druther.’ But - it just doesn’t work that way…until I have a child clean it for me.
And Amy - why would a woman of your thrift sense NOT regift? See, you need to quit calling it “regifting.” It is called “blessing some one else with this fine treasure.” You wouldn’t want to give them something worthless, but if you KNOW they will love it (and you don’t) then you should pass the joy along.
Comment by Holly (December 14, 2006 @ 9:13 pm )
I’ve been known to regift if it is really nice and I have no use for it but know someone who would. I have no idea how my microwave looks, my daughter was the last one to clean the kitchen (though I could venture a guess… ;)). And it rarely takes me more than 5 minutes to make myself presentable, after I get everyone else ready there isn’t more than 5 minutes time left over :).
Comment by Shelby (December 14, 2006 @ 9:21 pm )
(Sarah, you’re fine!)
About regifting….here’s the deal. It’s definitely good and swell to pass along a gift you were given so long as you don’t pretend like you bought it–assuming it’s perfect for the person you’re giving it to. Put another way, you shouldn’t give a lava lamp as a gift. Nobody wants it. Gadgets bought on late-night infomercials, fruit cake, and Santa Claus dishes… DO YOU HEAR ME? PEOPLE DON’T WANT YOUR JUNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKK! Give it to Goodwill.
I totally mean no offense, but somebody had to say it. Merry Christmas everyone, and don’t be mad at me just because you can’t get rid of that Chia Pet now in good conscience.
Comment by Amy Scott (December 14, 2006 @ 10:12 pm )
regifting junk - isn’t that what White Elephant parties are for?!
And, exactly what does an organized sock drawer look like?
Comment by Kendra Vita (December 14, 2006 @ 10:44 pm )
My microwave looks like the black hole- you see I put a piece of bread in it for over 5 minutes! the whole thing was smokin and there was nothing left of the bread, I do not want to clean it, so I’m going to buy a new one or maybe I’ll get one for christmas but it’s a great conversation piece! What does that say about me? hehe.
Comment by Beccy (December 14, 2006 @ 10:49 pm )
“I’m going to buy a new one or maybe I’ll get one for christmas but it’s a great conversation piece! What does that say about me? hehe.”
That you have wwwaayyy too much money on your hands! If I done it then I would pay my 16 year old to clean it for $10. She loves to earn extra money and I would save a hundred dollars.
It’s ok. I’m cheap. Rather cheap and well off in the future than overindulgent and poor in the future. I learned the hard way after 10 years of marriage. If you stop spending the money then you can actually buy theat something that you really want (not the new microwave LOL). All said in jest Beccy, just so you know:-) Blogs have a way of making us mean when we are joking.
Comment by Garcia (December 14, 2006 @ 11:11 pm )
The new header is wonderful, just beautiful! I get the 75 pictures..we just had a photographer come out to do my husband’s large family picture for the Grandparents. It was great, but the pictures done of just my family….my 7 year old boy smiled weird in all of them. All 20 of them. So, no family holiday greeting cards this year.
I did re-gift once…it was a brand new coffee mug I had bought for company from Russia. They did not understand that it was theirs and left it behind. I decided one night that the book I bought my dad for his birthday was not quite ‘enough’ so I added the mug with some candy inside it. The mug was brand-new with the sticker still on it. Well, my son decided to tell Grandpa all about who the mug was for first. I could have died. I will never re-gift again!!
blessings,
Jenny
Comment by Jenny in Ca (December 15, 2006 @ 1:23 am )
And, exactly what does an organized sock drawer look like?
Kendra
Thank you! I echo this question. If the socks are in a drawer and matched and you can find them, does that count as “Organized”?
My microwave - well, I know what I am doing next…….
Regifting - on occasion, but generally only little things to be added as an “extra” to a package. No Chia Pets, Lava Lamps or Egg Waves here!!!:
Comment by JulieP (December 15, 2006 @ 9:19 am )
Here is an organized sock drawer.
Jenny in Ca, Actually, you don’t get a BUZZZZZ award, because the gift you gave away wasn’t given to you. What you did was reassign a gift, which is a perfectly fine thing to do (since you asked).
Comment by Amy Scott (December 15, 2006 @ 10:59 am )
Well, you have my attention…what exactly DO you know about women who paint their toes odd colors? And just a little sidenote: my husband has a wonderful grasp of the English language and uses it almost flawlessly (including effect and affect) and his sock drawer is a mess (and it’s not because of me…I organize it every once in a while but the next day, it’s a mess again). Sorry to burst your bubble.
Comment by Anonymous (December 15, 2006 @ 12:37 pm )
I can totally relate to the “experience” of photographing ones children. We have not taken our Christmas Family Photo yet because of all the stress involved; and I only have three. But it’s worth it all, right? You and Greg are definitely extra brave for doing it in public! And let’s see, I can be ready in 5 minutes (although my idea of acceptable is way different now than before children) my micro is very clean, I don’t regift or polish my toenails (who has the time for that?!) and my sock drawer is fairly organized. What would Jesus say to all my “Martha” qualities?
Comment by Debbie (December 15, 2006 @ 2:24 pm )
Thanks, Amy. That is a pretty organized sock drawer. However, it only confirms what I’ve always said - organization costs money!! I could organize my whole house if only I had a $1000 gift card at the container store
Any ideas on how to duplicate this with items that I might already have at home?
Comment by Kendra (December 15, 2006 @ 3:24 pm )
Oh, no. Regifting should only be something REALLY good, that you either already have a duplicate of or you know the other person would (almost) kill to have! No lava lamps. No Chia pets.
It needs to be wrapped in original paper with tags, AND it can’t go to anyone who will ever find out.
In fact, it is even good to say, “I received this and have no use for it. Would you like it?” But then…you probably shouldn’t use it as a Christmas gift…more of a just…hand off.
You know, Amy…some of the gifts I have the fondest memories of are either heirloom type gifts from parents (that has been in the family a long time and definitely not new) or from my sister when she was a newly wed and really, really poor. She gave me some thrift store books. I loved them, and they weren’t new. They WERE chosen with me in mind, though, and that meant more than whether she could afford a new gift or not.
Wow! What rules I’m discovering for “re-gifting.”
Comment by Holly (December 15, 2006 @ 4:30 pm )
Amy,I just LOVE LOVE LOVE your blog!!!
Also, as much as I loved the laundry photo, I LOVE the picture of your children even more!! They are just beautiful!!
His,
Mrs. U
http://www.makingahouseahome.blogspot.com
Comment by Mrs. U (December 15, 2006 @ 5:45 pm )
Here is an organized sock drawer.
Oh my Amy! You’ve just made me feel terribly inadequate. Our socks are matched and in one drawer, but you have to dig to find the pair you want. Wow! I’m envious ( in a most biblical way) of your organizational skills!
Comment by JulieP (December 15, 2006 @ 6:55 pm )
Amen about the fruit cake.
~Stacy
Comment by Stacy (December 16, 2006 @ 1:21 am )
Huh. I can be ready in twenty minutes (presentable, anyway), my microwave looks well-used, but not disgusting and I regift, but only good stuff (like a huge set of food from Hickory Farms that I’d like to eat, but will not).
Can we be friends?
Comment by Mel (December 16, 2006 @ 2:57 am )
oh my… i guess I don’t quite measure up to par! Well…the sock drawers are organized…but not like that! White in one drawer, coloured in another. Makes it simple.
My microwave uh well..um…let’s not go there.
UNLESS my MIL is over and then well…go there as often as you want.
as for me and mine… after the boy is ready to go, I’m ready in like 2 minutes flat! 
Comment by Annette (December 16, 2006 @ 8:16 am )
when i was 18 - i took a long time to get ready. it took a lot of time to get my bangs to stand up - just right.
now, 5 minutes is luxurious but not always needed.
very fun post amy!
Comment by Ruth (December 16, 2006 @ 11:55 am )
You don’t regift? Really!?! That to me is such a frugal way to share and save. I think it’s part of wise stewardship. What if you are given a beautiful, name brand, fleece vest for Christmas and you already have one?

We are regifting this year. We just don’t need more stuff, so I pulled some baby toys out of the box, saved from oldest son, to give baby son for Christmas. He’ll never know and will love them. We’ll watch him play and reminisce. (Sentimental saver here. ;)) And with the saved money we shared with a family in need.
Comment by Roberta (December 16, 2006 @ 3:34 pm )
I have been thinking about Angelou’s quote and your modification of it– very convicting. I do, however, want to point out that Maya Angelou is a very fine writer and comparing her to Oprah is perhaps a stretch.
Comment by christy (December 16, 2006 @ 4:57 pm )
That’s not my sock drawer; just an example of one.
And yes, definitely pass along good gifts. (But you shouldn’t pretend that you bought them, should you?!?)
Comment by Amy Scott (December 16, 2006 @ 5:10 pm )
My toenails are blue. I’m up every morning at 6:30 am, but not to clean my microwave. I don’t wear socks. Am I really weird?
Love your blog!
Comment by Rebecca (December 16, 2006 @ 5:28 pm )
No…I guess you shouldn’t pretend that you bought them.
This is funny, and I just wanted to share, because last night we were given two “regifts.” One was a game, and the lady who gave it to me said, “I want your family to be able to enjoy this. Our family has outgrown it.” And she was really trying to bless us. And that was it. There wasn’t another gift to go along with it. Personally, I’d rather someone give me a used gift that they know I will love, instead of going into credit card debt to buy me something new I will dislike.
Comment by Holly (December 17, 2006 @ 12:13 am )
Right. True. one ought not to be a deceptive gift-giver.
And for this bargain lover (who scored two sets of “Your Story Hour”, in fabulous condition…one set had 11 tapes rather than 12 though…for a grand total of $3.50 at the thrift store) I do find it difficult to keep the “where and how much” respectibly quiet.
Comment by Roberta (December 17, 2006 @ 3:22 am )
Loved this post! Thank you so much for sharing.
Comment by Mrs. Eric (December 17, 2006 @ 3:23 pm )
This is my first time reading your blog–I like it!
Regarding “…the way he treats his mother…”, I broke off an engagement shortly after seeing how disrespectful and demeaning he was to his mother–so, so sad.
However, I married the man who treated BOTH of his parents (and mine) with respect and honor! Now he’s training our daughters what to look for and expect in their future husband–but we’re in no hurry!
Comment by connie (December 18, 2006 @ 2:16 am )
Okay, that sock drawer is just wrong! Thankfully, my husband only wears hanes socks, but I do line them up all going the same way (so they can fit in the drawer). My microwave is not clean, but I don’t care. I don’t eat off my microwave. I used to paint my toe nails all the time, any color, but not anymore.
And I absolutly regift. We have a “white elephant” gift exchange with my husbands family and the rules to that is to re-give something you don’t want. Two years in a row I’ve gotten really cool stuff. I’m cheap, what can I say?
Jennifer
Comment by Jennifer D (December 18, 2006 @ 2:34 pm )
Well, I’m with Holly way up on post #9. Socks may or may not be in the drawer depending on how caught up I am. The microwave doesn’t smoke when I cook. I take about 20 minutes if I don’t get interrupted a lot. Frankly, I never wonder where someone got the gift they gave me. I just appreciate the effort they put into it. If I have a duplicate of something, I will pass it on in its original condition or hold on to it as a replacement if I think it is useful. I pass on things that I think others will use or enjoy. Otherwise, I (will someday) garage sale it or Goodwill it. I’m still working on my clutterbug tendencies.
Comment by Another Heather (December 18, 2006 @ 3:28 pm )
To be honest, I paint my toe nails very odd colors, like black and guess what? I get up early…Very early and do not stop until very late managing my home and taking care of my kids and being diligent to guard my heart by being in the Word and prayer. All this is God’s grace.
I really don’t understand your blog. Seems to be much ado about nothing very important. Very confusing. What was the point? What edification came from it?
You seem to want to write and it seems you want to encourage through your writing, then encourage. Is your reader receiving wisdom and encouragement? Is there grace in your writing or criticalness? Is the foundation one of love for those who will read it and for those it is about?
Comment by Linda (December 18, 2006 @ 9:31 pm )
Amy
I paint my toes red in the summer. ( I like having pretty toes. If I can’t have a clean house, at least I have pretty toes.)
My microwave is clean. (See above comment I just wrote.)
It depends on how long it takes me to get ready. With crawling/walking baby, it takes longer, because I have to “put out fires.” If I take a shower, it takes longer. But I’m not fussy.
My sock drawer is NOT neat. (Not a priority right now.)
I also love regifting good gifts. Not junk, though.
And Linda, I find Amy’s blog to be VERY uplifting!
She’s a little tongue in cheek about a lot of stuff, but she points us gals (er, and guys) to the Lord Jesus! I’d say that’s encouraging.
Comment by Andrea (December 18, 2006 @ 11:19 pm )
Aw, yeah. Amy’s the absolute best!
She’s just young, and needs a little training in the finer, frugal aspects of re-gifting!
But I don’t think you’ll find anyone deeper, more encouraging, or better thought out! Amy consistently points us back to what is important in this life.
Thanks, Amy!
Comment by Holly (December 19, 2006 @ 2:13 pm )
Fun post, Amy! I’m kind of excited to have found a new blog to read…I don’t blog-jog very often.
I can be ready — shower to shoes — in 30 minutes (if they are consecutive minutes); I don’t have a microwave because someone told me about the water-killed-the-plant experiment; I only regift for “white elephant” exchanges.
Though I do struggle with “being creative,” which is to say I don’t awaken early enough.
Comment by grafted branch (December 21, 2006 @ 1:25 am )
I’ll bite. Care to elaborate? I’ve always wondered about cancer, cell phones, microwaves, all that stuff.
Comment by Amy Scott (December 22, 2006 @ 12:25 am )
I just had to mention that my husband has a wonderful grasp of the English language and isn’t too terrible at Greek and Latin (for someone who just studies it himself…he didn’t go to seminary)and is horrified by the misuse of any words (including affect and effect) but his sock drawer is SCARY!! I sometimes organize it (not like your picture!!) but it doesn’t stay that way long!! My run on sentences drive him nuts but he’s the calm one in traffic. I rage.
I can be ready in five minutes easy. Ummm, my microwave is almost always clean (ahh, the beauty of
slave laborchores) but I do regift. But rarely…and only things I think are nice. When I was in junior high, I would sometimes paint my toes weird colors. Now, I feel lucky to find the time to paint my toes. I like French manicures personally but don’t have the time or money for them!!Comment by Bethany (December 22, 2006 @ 2:04 am )
What’s wrong with lava lamps and chia pets?? I always wanted one of them for Christmas.
Oh…and I love fruitcake…but it has to be homeade.
Comment by shanti (December 23, 2006 @ 4:51 pm )
HOW in the world do you have time to blog AND clean your microwave? i regift, but only good things that i’d like to keep, like restaurant gift cards.
Comment by lindsay (January 17, 2007 @ 8:45 pm )