It costs some
Monday, Apr 30, 2007
Since it’s time to get real, I figured I’d mention that the thought has crossed my mind, “Now why am I torturing myself again?” [If you’re new here, I’ve been vomiting for a long time now.] I had a phone call this weekend from a blog commenter—who can identify herself if she wants—who lamented that her wonderful, godly children misbehave while her pregnant-self moans on the couch.
Kids take advantage of the situation. And it makes one despair. At least, that’s what she said. I had no idea what she was talking about.
Now, if you don’t know, I have a one-year-old and a two-year-old, in addition to an odd assortment of others– none of which can babysit, operate heavy machinery, or iron clothes yet. Now, my two-year-old is a gem, God bless her. However, my one-year-old is—ahem—less sanctified, shall we say.
It makes me think we should spend more time talking with the old folks. See what I mean here:
By Edgar Guest
The burdens they are bearing, with a child or two to raise.
Of course the cost of living has gone soaring to the sky
And our kids are wearing garments that my parents couldn’t buy.
Now my father wasn’t wealthy, but I never heard him squeal
Because eight of us were sitting at the table every meal.
And four or five they reckon makes a large-sized family.
A dozen hungry youngsters at a table I have seen
And their daddy didn’t grumble when they licked the platter clean.
Oh, I wonder how these mothers and these fathers up-to-date
Would like the job of buying little shoes for seven or eight.
Eight that cleaned our plates of pot-pie and then passed them up again;
Eight that needed shoes and stockings, eight to wash and put to bed,
And with mighty little money in the purse, as I have said,
But with all the care we brought them, and through all the days of stress,
I never heard my father or my mother wish for less.
One of the reasons I lean toward the old paths is because the people were less distracted than we are. Their lives were simpler; they knew what was important and what wasn’t.
21 Comments
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Needed to hear that today, Amy. Your words and his.
Blessings.
Comment by Andrea (April 30, 2007 @ 8:26 pm )
I love Edgar Guest! That is a lovely poem.
Comment by Janet (April 30, 2007 @ 8:36 pm )
Congrats on two posts in one day! Like the poem. Thanks for “keeping it real.” I was starting to wonder if I was the only one who wondered this sometimes.
Comment by Lora Lynn (April 30, 2007 @ 9:20 pm )
Oh, Amy. I’m not the only one who thinks this…
“Now why am I torturing myself again?” ? I can’t even tell you what that means to me! Even with the really bad parts of pregnancy, I want more blessings. I really do. But this part of me is screaming that I can’t do anymore. Of course it’s always been a matter of faith, but this is the first time I’m really realizing that I don’t even have enough faith on my own to do this. It’s humbling to see just how dependent I am on Him.
Thank you, thank you, for being willing to share all this - the good, the bad and the nauseating:)
Comment by Shannon Miller (April 30, 2007 @ 9:34 pm )
I read you title and thought, yes, it costs, but so do the alternatives.
I love that you and your family (and others like you — Andrea and Shannon amongst them) are an example of where we sould be investing. You inspire me. Bless you.
Comment by April (April 30, 2007 @ 10:52 pm )
Thank you for sharing this wonderful poem! Perhaps it is MY pregnancy hormones, but it just made me cry (but a GOOD kind of cry *smile*). I am expecting my 5th (at the end of August) and I had a hard time the first 4 months and I normally have a REALLY hard time the last month (and my last three babies have all been born early, my liver even shut down completly with number 3 and after other complications was born via emergency c-section to save both of us). Anyway, most folks just don’t understand why I put myself through this… but I truly believe that children are blessings from the Lord. I guess for us, it is really a matter of giving the Lord control and completely trusting in His soverign will for our lives.
Blessings and prayers,
Dana
Comment by Dana (May 1, 2007 @ 9:09 am )
Thanks, Amy…that’s a wonderful thought for me to store away for a later date when things get busier and I feel like complaining. Right now I only have one little one and am too young in my marriage to have had more than that..but, Lord willing, our family will one day resemble yours. And I’m trying to glean what I can from you and your commenters while I still have time to learn. I’m glad you’re feeling better enough to post!
Comment by Lisa (May 1, 2007 @ 9:47 am )
By the way, that was an excellent article by Dr. Mohler…thanks for pointing it out on the side-rail!
Comment by Lisa (May 1, 2007 @ 9:48 am )
Thank you so much for that dose of encouragement, Amy!
We have 6 little ones and I’ve asked myself that question a few times. (Although the oldest just turned 10 the other day so he’s not so little anymore!) It’s all worth while …even after a day of fussin’, discipline, schoolin’, cleanin’, and lovin’.
Two posts in one day! Hurray for you! Hope you are on the mend and feeling back to “normal” soon!
God bless you!
Carmen
Comment by Carmen (May 1, 2007 @ 1:16 pm )
Thank you for that post, Amy! It was such an encouragement to hear. I work outside the home and long to be a SAHM (end of the year). I would love to make my life more simple and to get back to the basics. I often second guess myself when I think of farming, sewing clothing, etc… maybe I am being a romantic! Very encouraging! Thanks again!
Comment by Lu (May 1, 2007 @ 2:20 pm )
What a sweet sweet poem!
Hope you begin to feel better soon!
Kim
Comment by Kim (May 1, 2007 @ 4:12 pm )
Thanks for the thoughts and poem, Amy! So glad to hear more from you ~ continuing to pray!
Comment by Laurel (May 1, 2007 @ 4:33 pm )
My Mom grew up in a family of 9 during the Depression and WWII.Those 9 were born in less than 14 years! So Grandma was pregnant or nursing for a long, long time. My Grandpa worked full-time as an electrician and then came home to farm, with a horse for several years, to raise some cash crops and help make ends meet. Grandma had a big vegetable garden, along with her beloved flowers, and “put up” quarts of produce for the winter. I don’t know if she had a wood stove or not, but I would guess she did. Laundry was done in a wringer washer and hung outside, summer and winter. Of course, nothing was permanent press and all of it needed ironing. As the kids got older, they helped out of course, but it still couldn’t have been an easy road. NOT ONCE, NOT EVER, did I hear either one of them complain about those years. Despite mistakes and sins (out-of-wedlock births and divorce included) their children and 36 great-grandkids were their greatest joy in life and ALL of us knew that we were LOVED at ALL times.
At their 50th wedding anniversary party most of us attended and we sang “Amazing Grace” for them. After we finished, one of their “snowbird” friends turned to my Grandpa and said, “You’re a rich man, Claude, a rich man”. And when Grandma was old and couldn’t sleep, she tried to remember each great-grand’s name and to whom they belonged.
Edgar Guest’s poem fits them perfectly. They are my heroes and the biggest reason why I let God plan my family (7 to date and it looks like the end). Thank you for sharing those words.
“Be not weary in well-doing, for in due season you shall reap if you faint not.”
Comment by MamaTod (May 1, 2007 @ 4:43 pm )
Amy,
It’s so good to hear from you again! I’ll continue to pray for you, your family and your new “Thanksgiving Blessing”!
Comment by Dene (May 1, 2007 @ 5:04 pm )
This post really spoke to my heart. Although I only had 3 children somehow both your words and the poem were touching.
Comment by Susanne (May 1, 2007 @ 6:32 pm )
Thanks for sharing that. We copied, saved it, and passed it along.
Blessings,
Theresa
Comment by Theresa (May 1, 2007 @ 8:15 pm )
What a beautiful poem!! I understand about the children taking advantage of it…….mine are wonderful and helpful and well behaved………………but, if I get asked “can we watch a movie?” one more time while KNOWING the answer will be no…….I might have to scream.
I am still keeping you in my prayers. My mother is relentless in her questioning about my morning sickness now and with pregnancies past; to see if she can determine the sex. (((SIGH))) All I can determine is that I am nauseous.
Comment by Candi (May 2, 2007 @ 9:58 am )
I’m not pregnant, but this poem made me weepy too! We just moved out of a church of 7 years that was rather anti-family….not hate family, just not encouraging to those with children. We are now in a church where 11 women are pregnant! They just had a ‘batch’ of 9 that had children! Now, if I get blessed with another blessing, I definitely won’t feel out of place. I cannot tell you how often in the last 7 years I felt the desire for more children, but never found a place for them in our ‘ministry’ at the other church. How many times I felt that people viewed children there as a burdan….not anymore! Now if I can just overcome my fear of the morning sickness again…..I just may have another one….pray for me….
Comment by Kristy (May 2, 2007 @ 10:22 am )
“people were less distracted than we are. Their lives were simpler; they knew what was important and what wasn’t. ”
So true, and oh to live this way in this day.
Comment by Mark from Alabama (May 2, 2007 @ 10:52 am )
Amy, I am so glad to see you posting and feeling better.
“people were less distracted than we are. Their lives were simpler; they knew what was important and what wasn’t.”
I enjoyed Edgar Guest’s poem too. Now not to be a negative ninny here, but… I do think sometimes we tend to romanticize times past. There has always been sin since the garden and I think Satan has always been just as tricky as far as getting people to focus on self gratification and non-essentials that kept people away from God and family. Even at the time that Mr. Guest’s poem refers to there were families in which the father left because of the stress of all the mouths to feed. Some considered children a burden in our society and others probably since the beginning of time, because it is contrary to God’s word and that is what Satan wants. Remember even the disciples tried to keep the children from “bothering” Jesus. The reason I wanted to comment on this is because I too fall victim to romanticizing times past and I think this takes away from acknowledging the power of God’s Grace to give us character and self-control, be it in the past, present, or future.
Did I mention that I am glad you are feeling better?
Comment by Stacy (May 2, 2007 @ 6:14 pm )
I loved that poem! We may only have 2 children at this point,but the poem illustrates the lovely old-fashioned atmosphere we strive to have in our home.
Blessings
Claire
Comment by Fathers Grace Ministries (May 3, 2007 @ 9:48 pm )