A woman confided to me at a New York dinner party, “Honestly, who has time to cook anymore? My daughter will probably grow up wondering what a kitchen is used for.” The lament had the predictable blend of weariness and braggadocio, unremarkable except for this woman’s post at the helm of one of the nation’s major homemaking magazines. (link)

There are many family life ideals I’ve had to sacrifice on the altar of practicality, but regularly eating dinner together as a family is one we’ve managed to hold onto. We have a houseful (and a handful), and it’d be easy to justify regular on-the-go eating or a’ la carte grazing. It’s not that eating together is next to godliness. There is nothing about sitting down together at the dinner table that makes one family more spiritual than the next. However, I think there are certain rituals that make it easier to keep connections with one another and do the things required of us—namely, to raise children who know God and what He requires of us. Eating together is one of those things that make parenting easier in the long run.

When Greg was gone 12-14 hours a day for many years, he’d be up by 4 or 5 a.m. so that he could get his work done by dinnertime. Even with heavy work weeks, we usually sat down at 5:30 for dinner. Part of that, admittedly, is that I was DONE with the day by 5:30 p.m. and in real need of reinforcements. (I think the “done” feeling moves up an hour every time we add a baby.) The other part is that we just enjoy it.

In the early years, I think it’s more about establishing habits, manners, and pleasant children than it is about having meaningful, deep conversations. The fun part comes later, and we’re just moving into that stage ourselves. When they’re little, you’re teaching them how to be the kind of people that others enjoy being around, so that when they grow up, they don’t play the victim. If you are snubbed a party invitation, your time is better spent figuring out why than complaining about it and bemoaning other people’s cliques. It’s what I always say, anyway.

I saw this list of 10 questions from a father’s perspective (here’s the link) to ask your children if you need some fodder. A few are appropriate for dinner and some aren’t, depending on the number of people around the table:

  • How are your devotions?
  • What is God teaching you?
  • In your own words, what is the gospel?
  • Is there a specific sin you’re aware of that you need my help defeating?
  • Are you more aware of my encouragement or my criticism?
  • What’s daddy most passionate about?
  • Do I act the same at church as I do when I’m at home?
  • Are you aware of my love for you?
  • Is there any way I’ve sinned against you that I’ve not repented of?
  • Do you have any observations for me?
  • How am I doing as a dad?
  • How have Sunday’s sermons impacted you?
  • Does my relationship with mom make you excited to be married?
  • (On top of these things, with my older kids, I’m always inquiring about their relationship with their friends and making sure God and his gospel are the center of those relationship. And I look for every opportunity to praise their mother and increase their appreciation and love for her.)

Now, I began my writing 20 minutes ago for the express purpose of sharing a Jambalaya recipe with you, but I got carried away. The reason I wanted to share it is because I love recipes that only use one dish. This makes cooking more practical and probable if cleanup is a breeze. Now, we dirty two pots because I make a Kid Version and an Adult Version. Greg and I like it hot and spicy. This is a rule I rarely break (making kiddie food), but I transgress the law when I must turn up the heat. You just gotta do it sometimes.

Jambalaya

(This is Dave’s recipe, but I included my notes as well.)

3 TBSP vegetable oil
2 cups yellow onions - diced
1 cup green bell pepper - diced
1/2 cup celery – diced [Amy: I use celery seed]
4-5 cloves garlic - chopped
2 tsp cayenne pepper
S&P to taste
1lb smoked sausage
1lb diced chicken
4-5 bay leaves
2- 14.5 oz cans diced tomato (can be flavored)
3 cups of uncooked rice
6 cups chicken stock [Amy: I use water and bullion.]
2 cans Goya pigeon peas [Amy: 1 peas, 1 black bean]
Chopped green onions to taste

I usually start by browning the chicken in the same pot I’m going to cook everything in. [Amy: I use cooked, cubed boneless chicken in my freezer. You can find so many uses for it!] I season the chicken with S&P and Emeril’s essence or you can season it with paprika, garlic, S&P, and a dash of cayenne. The Chicken does not have to be cooked through just browned. Remove the chicken and add onion-season with S&P and the cayenne. [Amy: I don’t remove it, as it still works and the baby is crying…]

Sauté onions until translucent, add bell pepper and celery. Sauté for another 2-3 minutes add garlic and bay leaves. Add sausage and sauté until sausage has browned add reserved chicken, canned tomatoes, and rice. Let cook for 2-3 minutes in order for the rice to absorb flavor. Now is as good time to check the flavor - you can add more seasoning if you feel it needs it. Pour in chicken stock and pigeon peas, bring to a boil, give it a good stir, reduce heat to simmer and cover. Simmer 30-40 minutes or until all liquid is gone – there is no need to stir. After liquid is gone stir jambalaya add green onions and let rest 4-5 minutes covered. Serve! You can add shrimp to this recipe but I would wait until the end even if the shrimp are already cooked as shrimp tend to get tough if you overcook them.

Amy here again: Now to do the kiddie version, half everything, using just the chicken, sausage, rice, chicken stock, and black beans.

And just to share some link love, here are two sites you might want to visit. Tammy’s Recipes is worth a stop just to look at the pictures. And finally, you might be interested in The Family Meal Table DVD if you need some renewed vigor on the subject.

I do believe I got carried away here. I must need some cheesecake, which is legal when you’re T-minus 5 weeks.