Hope deferred
Wednesday, Nov 7, 2007
Many of you might remember that book, 88 Reasons Why the Rapture Could Be in 1988. When it came out, I was 12-years-old growing up in a charismatic house. From September 11 – 13, 1988, I sat on the couch by the yellowed plastic blinds looking out at the sky and praying a prayer of repentance every hour– plus several times in between just to be sure. I wanted Jesus to come back and sort of didn’t. I was a little nervous that He’d come in the clouds right after I sinned but before I repented. But He didn’t return and my hope for His coming then fizzled with the movie rights to the book.
If I rewind a little more, I can remember another time my hopes were dashed. When I was about four- or five-years-old, I saw commercials on the TV at day care for Fresh N’ Fancy. All I wanted for Christmas was Fresh N’ Fancy. When Christmas morning arrived, I remember peering down from the townhouse balcony and seeing the box unwrapped underneath the tree. I rushed down, opened the cellophane, and after about five minutes, felt really ripped off. I didn’t get anything else, and Fresh N’ Fancy was overpriced colorless, odorless plastic pieces of faux make-up. It wasn’t even real.
Then there was another Christmas. It was 1995. I’d met Greg earlier that March and wondered what was taking so long for a proposal and his first, “I love you.” Things were serious, and I was ready to tell him to step up or step off, if you know what I mean. So I assume he’s waiting for Christmas so he can get by with just one gift—my engagement ring. He presents me with a huge box, but when I keep opening it, the package gets smaller and smaller and smaller. Yes! Finally, I open the last box. It is a very small jewelry box, the size of a ring. I open it.
There are gold earrings in the box. Gold earrings, ladies.
I pretended to like them, but I hated them. I hated them so much. I tried to smile, and he sat there clueless about what my weird behavior was all about. I cried in my pillow all night for my stupidity, for my expectations, for my wonderment about being duped about the whole thing. I was “serious” all right…seriously stupid.
I feel like Charlie Brown a lot. He runs up to kick the football, but in the end, Lucy pulls it away every….single….time.
The reason I’m thinking about hope today is because I have a lot to hope for. My baby is due tomorrow, and five children thus far, I’ve never gone past my due date. (Yes, I know “normal” goes to 42 weeks.) But I’m wallowing in pity anyway. Remember when I was vomiting my guts out all day, every day for weeks in the first trimester? I circled the day of my second trimester and told myself, “Just hang on until that day. It will all be OK by then.” When I woke up that magical morning, I waited to feel the relief, but it never came. I just threw up and threw up some more.
So I circled the due date (tomorrow, November 8th) on my calendar and told myself, “Just hang on until that day. It will all be OK by then.” I will not need to hang onto the walls and countertops to walk. I will not be in pain. I will not be nauseous.
We’ll see about that. I just can’t get Charlie Brown out of my mind.
The Bible says that hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. (Proverbs 13:12) The thing about hope is that it means something entirely different when we put our hope in God. It is not a maybe, might be, Christmas-disaster sort of thing. It is sure, secure, and just as certain as if it already happened. When we hope for things to possess, people to come through, or situations to work out, these things are subject to whim, circumstance, and sometimes the elusive hormone kicking in. But when we hope in God—that He will do the things He said He’d do, be the things He said He’d be, wash us in the blood He bought— we can be certain that the football waiting on the field will never be snatched away.
74 Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI
Leave a comment
Praying for you that your little on will come on time
and without complication.
Comment by Courtney (November 7, 2007 @ 2:44 pm )
Thank you for sharing the truth about hope. What we hope in, or hope for- determines whether we will be satisfied or not. “Sure and secure”- I like that. That’s what I have when I hope in HIM.
Comment by Lauren at Faith Fuel (November 7, 2007 @ 2:51 pm )
“I am still confident of this; I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” - Psalm 27:13-14
Hang in there, kiddo!
Comment by Emily (November 7, 2007 @ 2:54 pm )
Praying for you and for your little one to arrive safely!
Comment by MamaArcher (November 7, 2007 @ 3:04 pm )
I’m here (in blazing hot Arizona) praying for you and stalking your blog. This baby WILL come out. It WILL be over before you know it. Hang in there (and eat some icecream).
Whatever you do, don’t go on a long, brisk, painful walk. It probably won’t help and then you’ll just be sore. I did that ONCE.
Sending cyber hugs your way.
Comment by Janet (November 7, 2007 @ 3:07 pm )
No problem when you can barely walk anyway!
Comment by Amy Scott (November 7, 2007 @ 3:13 pm )
Amy,words fail me. That you can write such words of faithfulness and trust when you are in such great discomfort awes and inspires me. I thank God for your wisdom through all these trying months. I look forward to hearing of the birth of your little one - but probably not as much as you do! Jean
Comment by jean (November 7, 2007 @ 3:57 pm )
AMEN! : )
And hoping that little one comes quickly and healthily! May the Lord give you grace till the chosen day for his arrival!!!!
Comment by shawnda (November 7, 2007 @ 4:23 pm )
I remember September, 1988. I was pregnant with my first child and was sort of bothered by the idea of the rapture happening before I gave birth. Our pastor at the time took the whole thing a little more seriously than he should have (against his better judgment) and ended up in deep depression afterward. Vivid memories. Sad memories. Irritating memories. May tomorrow (or some day soon) bring good and joyful memories for you as you welcome a new member into your family.
Comment by Kelly (November 7, 2007 @ 4:37 pm )
Here’s praying that you get your Nov. 8 baby because
a. you don’t need one more day of pregnancy, period, the end.
b. tomorrow is my Rebekah’s 2nd birthday.
God bless you!
Comment by Amy (November 7, 2007 @ 4:59 pm )
I am praying that your precious one arrives very soon! Hang in there… It won’t be long now!!! I can’t wait to hear the news!
Comment by Tina (November 7, 2007 @ 5:16 pm )
Oh! Every time something comes in from you on my reader, I get excited all over again. May the LORD bless you with a fear-free labor, and delivery of a new arrow, SOON!
Comment by Valerie@Consider It Done (November 7, 2007 @ 5:33 pm )
Can’t help you at all, Amy. After my first child ruined my life by being 2 weeks early, the rest of my children were late until I got smart and had the midwife break my water way before my due date with my last 2. You can also try going to the hospital pretending to be in labor and ask them to break your water. I did that and it worked.
Comment by Cindy (November 7, 2007 @ 5:38 pm )
Amy, I will pray that it happens soon for you. How about showing us some pregnancy pictures??
Comment by Kristy (November 7, 2007 @ 5:40 pm )
Oh, and I grew up sitting in church waiting for the rapture. Sometimes I thought it had occurred when my mother wasn’t doing laundry watching Days of our Lives when I got home from school. Once I couldn’t find my boyfriend, now husband, on campus and his roommate said the Lord had probably returned and decided to only take him. I was ripe for a theology change by the time I was 20.
Comment by Cindy (November 7, 2007 @ 5:40 pm )
I am just not humble enough. Eating helps with the third trimester nausea, so I’ve gained 40 pounds.
This better be a 10 pounder (well, maybe not…).
On another note, how about some love for my Christmas Earring story? I still feel sorry for myself… I suppose it’s time to get OVER it.
Cindy, I asked for a sweep with all my prodromal nonsense last week, but the OB mumbled something about lawsuits and not wanting to do it (but willing to hook me up to some Pit if I wanted). Instead of arguing the logic of that one, I just went home feeling sorry.
On another note, I am doing well with not being afraid. I think it’s one of those things where I know that the pain is so intense that there isn’t room for another emotion to get in the way or anything. I am OK with it.
Comment by Amy Scott (November 7, 2007 @ 5:55 pm )
Oh, Amy, this is the beauty of your posts…your heart…how you always point to our Lord. “Our hope is built on nothing less, than Jesus’ blood and righteousness…”
As for the Rapture/1988 thing, I remember the day as well…I think I was 13. I had the same emotions as you…it got so hyped in my family.
And for the earrings, my dear, just take a look at the man you’ve got, and won’t it all fade away??!
Praying for a soon delievery.
Comment by Andrea (November 7, 2007 @ 6:00 pm )
Just look at it this way — it WILL over by Thanksgiving! And boy, will you be thankful….
And — did you clue Greg in - and when DID he propose? And mine — was a yellow gold and black onyx angel - I HATE yellow gold and black onyx — I lost it. I felt bad (REALLY!!!) but not tooo bad. He married me anyway!
Comment by Heather (November 7, 2007 @ 6:17 pm )
OH Amy - my eldest will be 7 tomorrow. Here’s hoping for a shared birthday.
“We know in all things God works for the good of those who love Him”
Please keep posting otherwise we start wondering…….
Praying
Elaine
Comment by mummymac (November 7, 2007 @ 6:48 pm )
According to the 12-week scan my due date would have been the same as yours, the 8th, but I was so certain of my dates making d-day the 15th and pointed this out to the OB…now I’m wishing I hadn’t!!
Could it be you have SPD? I reckon it’s what I’ve got which is making walking and dressing in particular just a little difficult!
Waiting, wondering, and praying with you!
Naomi
Comment by Naomi (November 7, 2007 @ 7:17 pm )
Good luck with the labor and delivery. I will pray for a fast and PAIN FREE delivery.
jennifer
Comment by Jennifer (November 7, 2007 @ 7:23 pm )
Okay, so, I’ll say it: I can’t believe he gave you earrings!!!! That’s like the year when I had just had our youngest and I couldn’t even walk - bedridden after the delivery with sciatica and a multitude of problems - and my hubby bought me a new DustBuster for Christmas! Because I had said ours was dying and we needed to get a new one. Meaning, WE, as in, set some money aside one payday to buy a good one. Not, hey, buy me one for Christmas, seeing as I can’t even take care of myself or our children and won’t be able to use the thing for God knows how long.
So, when did he finally give you the ring??? The next day? Please, tell me it was the next day and the earrings were just a joke…
Though it seems that whenever it was, it was definitely worth the wait.
Comment by Laura (November 7, 2007 @ 7:28 pm )
I second Laura’s question… obviously there eventually WAS a ring soooo…
Think of it this way, telling us all the wonderful detailed story of your engagement will take your mind off your impending due date! Just thinking of you!! ~wink~
Of course, November 8th is not over yet! I’ll be praying for Baby Scott to get the lead out!
Comment by Lady Why (November 7, 2007 @ 7:53 pm )
Ok, I’ll pipe in about the earrings. That was just awful. The several box thingie leading to ONE small box. Really, was he teasing you? How soon after that did you get engaged? I hope you say the next day. Was he really clueless? Cuz most people I know don’t go to that kind of trouble to wrap EARRINGS.
Comment by Janet (November 7, 2007 @ 8:01 pm )
Greg, Greg, Greg. C’mon. I hope you’ve learned…..
Lots of love, Amy. Soon!
Comment by Holly (November 7, 2007 @ 8:08 pm )
I feel for you.
Personally, I always get a little manic after the due date passes. I was 40 weeks + 1 day last time, feeling regular contractions, 40 minutes away from the hospital, so of course, jumped the gun and the contractions went away as soon as we got there. I was like, “Forget it, induce me. My mom’s there with the kids. I’m not going home without this baby.”
I hope and pray your little one decides to make his move very soon, so your suffering can end. God be with you!
Only three or four weeks left to go here. The last bit is longest part of the wait, it seems.
Comment by Susannah (November 7, 2007 @ 9:02 pm )
I was born on my due date of November 8th!
I am sure that makes you feel much better to know that ~ NOT! :}
Comment by Melissa (November 7, 2007 @ 9:17 pm )
Praying for you!
So you were a day care kid, too? Me too! That is why my husband and I make whatever sacrifices we have to in order to keep our little ones out of day care and to homeschool them.
And about waiting for a proposal - I was the one who told my husband that we were going to get married. Fortunately he agreed. We had only been dating for six weeks, but he is very shy and I wasn’t going to get gray hair waiting around for a proposal from him. My sympathy to you about the gold earrings. Maybe Greg could make up for it this Christmas?
Comment by Valerie (November 7, 2007 @ 9:33 pm )
Me, I saw my little box (the one) on an Easter as I was expecting, but then saw it tucked back into my beloved’s pocket. Hope deferred… oh yeah. *sigh, smile* It all worked out eventually.
I saw a biographical special on Charles Schulz last week and it talked a lot about that football and how it was very representative of his belief system/insecurities. They showed an interview with him shortly before he died of cancer, him crying as he talked about it. It made me so sad that he never found the hope you’re speaking of.
As for you, girl, I’m praying… praying for grace and for peace. Praying that you will not be afraid. May the Lord reveal Himself as your Rock in the midst of the nitty gritty of your labor. Soon it will come!
For you: “I will wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope.” ~ Ps. 130:5
Comment by Miriam (November 7, 2007 @ 9:47 pm )
Oh Amy, I hope you don’t have to go another 2 weeks. OTOH, my super-late babies have been in a real hurry to get out once they decided it was time (as in, 4 hours!) so maybe it’s worth it. :p
Don’t bother with castor oil, by the way.
Comment by Margaret (November 7, 2007 @ 9:51 pm )
So how did he propose?
Comment by Carole (November 7, 2007 @ 10:37 pm )
Amy,
You can now start the countdown - “I know I will have this baby in the next two weeks.” I’ll be praying God’s peace to your heart as you wait and hope in Him.
I’m praying for you. Six months ago I was in your position, except mine was months of insomnia and just general discomfort, not nausea. Two of my four pregnancies to that point had gone 2 weeks past due. I was now 12 days overdue with number 5 and just aching to not be pregnant anymore. I thought it would never end, but now 6 months later here we are and all the discomfort is a distant memory. I still get practice with the sleepless nights, though
Tina H.
Comment by Tina H. (November 7, 2007 @ 11:18 pm )
Oh, Amy, I had the same “gold earrings for Christmas” experience. I was positive it was an engagement ring. My disappointment was profound. I felt like an idiot.
Comment by Susan in Elk Grove CA (November 7, 2007 @ 11:38 pm )
Earrings! EARRINGS!!! Oh sister, I feel your pain.
BTW, I’m 37 weeks tomorrow. I’m going to die if I go past my due date. The last two were a week early. Time seems to have screeched to a halt. Hope you go soon!
Oh, and I didn’t have to do jury duty today. My number wasn’t called. Local bad guys breathed a sigh of relief!
Comment by Jo (November 8, 2007 @ 12:00 am )
here’s hoping the hope is fulfilled TOMORROW!
as for me and my twins, we will be serving bedrest time.
blast it all.
Comment by Elizabeth (November 8, 2007 @ 1:18 am )
Amy,
Checking on you from not-so-sunny-today Australia to see if you’ve had the baby yet…but no. Hope she/he comes soon.
And, I’ve just read ALL the comments to see if anyone else wanted to know the end of the earring story. I’m just dying to find out what happened!
Perhaps Greg can fill us in while you recover from labour and the tiring weeks to come.
Post a picture when you can!
love Caroline
Comment by Caroline (November 8, 2007 @ 3:42 am )
Earrings…………….I can imagine the let down. Love to hear if he planned that just to keep you on your toes!!
As for being due tomorrow - I do hope bubs arrives soon! I have only had 2 children - only born at 35 weeks and 1 at 39 weeks so I CAN NOT imagine going overdue. I cried at 39 weeks as I was over it - I was mentally prepared for anything from 35 weeks so I felt 4 weeks overdue as far as I was concerned!
All the best Amy. Look forward to seeing pics of your new babe!
Cheers, Wilm
Comment by wilm (November 8, 2007 @ 3:55 am )
I have no idea what Greg was thinking. Doesn’t he know what’s far more than rubies when he sees it? How much longer did he wait? And do you like the gold earrings he gave you now?
On another note, I thought of you this morning as I was getting ready for the day, and have been praying for your hope in Christ. I’ve also been praying that he would show you grace in allowing things to get going soon and quickly. Keep us posted!
Comment by Lisa (November 8, 2007 @ 8:17 am )
I told my husband the earring story, and his response was something in the neighborhood of, “What’s wrong with that?” Face it. Men just don’t understand stuff like that. Your husband probably thought he was giving you a very nice gift.
My husband has said many times, “I can’t read your mind. If you want me to do something, you have to tell me plainly. I’m not that complicated. I can’t pick up on subtle hints.”
So, I’m giving Greg the benefit of the doubt and assuming he was truly trying to do something nice, not tease you.
Of course, I think I still would have punched him. Maybe you can do that while you’re in labor, just to get it out of your system once and for all. No one will suspect you of malice when you are in pain.
Comment by Kelly (November 8, 2007 @ 8:39 am )
I remember September 1988 very well.I was living in Ft.Walton Beach ,orida and a tropical storm was approaching us.We joked at the Christian day care that I was working at that God was coming in on a wave riding a surf board.
We had a long awaited prayer answered for our family.God gave my husband a job locally so he won’t have to travel anymore.This was a 17 month wait!!
Hopefuly soon we will hear about the new Scott baby.
Comment by Tammy (November 8, 2007 @ 9:24 am )
Yes, Amy please do tell us when the actual ring was presented.
Thank you for sharing with us.
Praying for you. I hate to tell you this, but the more kids I had, the longer each pregnancy lasted. Number six was one day past my due date, # 7 was 6 days past.
Comment by Robin in New Jersey (November 8, 2007 @ 9:37 am )
Amy! So, did Greg eventually propose, or do you have something to tell us? Don’t leave us hanging like that!
And, B, I hate to tell you this my friend, but that baby’s coming out! I don’ t know the day or the hour, but that baby’s coming out! Count on it!!
Amy R.
Comment by AmyR. (November 8, 2007 @ 9:46 am )
Amy - agreeing with comments from #7:
Oh, Amy, this is the beauty of your posts…your heart…how you always point to our Lord. “Our hope is built on nothing less, than Jesus’ blood and righteousness…”
Thank you, sweet Amy - you are a role model to young and old alike. God bless you, you are in our prayers.
Comment by Lynne (November 8, 2007 @ 10:01 am )
Woops, I meant #17
Comment by Lynne (November 8, 2007 @ 10:02 am )
Dear Amy,
I am praying for encouragement for you RIGHT THIS SECOND!
At least with this gift, you KNOW you won’t be disappointed about what’s inside!
Love,
Marsha
Comment by Marsha (November 8, 2007 @ 10:52 am )
The thing about the Christmas earring story is that you did eventually get the ring. Remember that.
Maybe God is going to let you go over a little to help alleviate your fear of the pain of delivery. If you get just that fed up with being pregnant, maybe you will be more mentally prepared to deal with the final stage.
It’s kind of like going down that first big hill of a roller coaster. If you scream real loud and push real hard, it goes faster and something about the screaming relases the pain the same way it helps your stomach stop heaving when you scream on the way down a steep descent on a roller coaster. If you don’t do roller coasters, you probably can’t relate. I don’t do roller coasters anymore, but I used to.
God is with you. God loves you. God is in control. Seriously, I do not believe that He cares whether you have a gentle and quiet spirit while you are delivering; as long as you don’t lose your temper, I don’t think general screaming is any sin during delivery, if it helps. I never needed to until the final expulsion, but then I did and I do not regret any of it.
Comment by ruth (November 8, 2007 @ 10:58 am )
Thank you for these words. As right now I’m feeling like the football has been pulled away once again in our long-deferred hopes of conceiving a first child, this was just what I needed to read today.
Comment by andrea_jennine (November 8, 2007 @ 11:18 am )
I am amazed at your collectedness at this point. I just went through my fourth c-section. At 37 weeks, the doctor said that I could deliver at 38. But, when I came in for my appointment that week, she said “I’d really like for you to wait until 39.” Aaaaahhh! I cried so much, I was just so ready for it to be over.
May the Lord continue to give you his peace as you await his perfect timing.
Comment by Kendra (November 8, 2007 @ 1:27 pm )
Every time I get to the point where I just can’t take a pregnancy anymore, I find myself crying out to God for RELIEF and I have always delivered within 48 hours. I’m praying that God will give you the same relief.
God bless you. I know how you feel!!!! I’ve been there, and am just about there again. I’ll be 35 weeks tomorrow!
Love,
Becca
P.S. I still vote that you stick with Lydia.
Comment by Becca (November 8, 2007 @ 1:47 pm )
Maybe just one more plea to tell us the rest of the engagement story will make a difference…
But I’ll be nice and say it can wait until after the birth.
After that, you get no more slack
Comment by Carly (November 8, 2007 @ 2:19 pm )
I got the ring on my birthday and one month later for Christmas he gave me long underwear as “the” gift. I remember my sister saying, “I’m sooo sorry”. Nine years later again I received long underwear, but this time it was silk. Did I mention that I live in South Florida?
My last two children were 2 weeks late. The only thing that helped me was the verse, “When the time had fully come, God sent His Son…”. Even Mary had to wait for Jesus to be born. He appointed a time for His Son to be born and He has appointed a time for your babe to be born. God is in total control here. Frustrating, isn’t it? But He absolutely loves you, so rest in Him.
Comment by Debbie (November 8, 2007 @ 2:34 pm )
Well. I, for one, am dying with you about those gold earrings. Oh, I would have been *so* crushed. I’ll bet Greg now knows better.
I have been dutifully checking in each day to see about that baby. Every time Bloglines tells me you have a new post, I am in eager expectation for one or two seconds until I see that: No, this is a not a baby announcement, it’s only a new del.icio.us link. [enter crabby face here].
But, Amy? When the time does come (and I’m praying it comes very SOON for you!), you’re going to do GREAT! I can’t wait to hear about how different this delivery is from your last deliveries. You’re going to beat the fear and do an excellent job. I’m sure of it!
~Stacy
Comment by Stacy (November 8, 2007 @ 3:30 pm )
Did you ever see the English television show called Mr Bean? He did this to his girlfriend, only in the small jewellery box it wasn’t gold earrings, it was the gold hooks to hang the picture from the shop that his girlfriend had shown so much interest in; a picture of a man giving an engagement ring to his girlfriend. Mr Bean really didn’t get it. His lady friend left crying and I am not sure they ever got married, which is probably a good thing, because his life was littered with stupidity.
Thinking of you and hoping baby comes now.
Blessings,
Amanda Axelby
Comment by Amanda Axelby (November 8, 2007 @ 4:24 pm )
Amy, I feel for you, really I do. My fifth baby, bless his heart, came three weeks early. So, I EXPECTED the sixth one to come early, too. July rolled around and I expected to go into labour every single day. Nothing. August rolled around and the due date (the sixth) came and went. I thought I would be pregnant forever. ON the TWENTY-THIRD I finally was admitted into the hospital where the horrid OB told me that I wasn’t actually late, that my due date was wrong, and that my baby was only going to be a 6 pounder, if we were lucky.
Sarah was TEN and a HALF pounds. Sick, on top of it all. Placenta wasn’t doing its job, apparently.
I didn’t like the OB much.
But, we both survived, and Sarah is now newly married. Even though I can think of nothing good about that experience, I still know that God is good, and that He had a reason for it all.
Now, don’t go thinking that you will end up overdue by a month. I highly doubt it. But as many of the ladies have assured you, that little Scott baby will come out, eventually. And you will rejoice.
And all of us will rejoice with you.
Love,
Janet
Comment by Janet (November 8, 2007 @ 6:54 pm )
Amy,
I can’t say anything that everyone else hasn’t already said except that I’m pregnant with my 5th and the first 4 all came late. My midwife gave some great advice: If the mom and baby are healthy the baby won’t come early. Isn’t that great news?!? Yeah, I know. Just thought I’d remind you that a few extra days in the oven make for a better prepared bun. You’re in my prayers. Keep up that sense of humor. It does wonders for the wait time.
Blessings,
Karen
Comment by Karen (November 9, 2007 @ 12:00 am )
Praying for you today, Amy.
Comment by April (November 9, 2007 @ 1:02 am )
I was hoping for a midnight update that said it was all a lie and that you were on your way to the hospital when you last posted…that the 7.8 pound baby (Karina Elizabeth, whose name would mean the same thing as Annalise Kathryn’s which would be kind of fun) was born on her due date in record time without an epidural (because you didn’t think you needed one), the placenta was what weighed so much instead, and that Greg was too busy taking photos of you and the 6 kiddos piled onto the bed to update the blog. Oh, and that everyone forgot about the dog in the meantime, and Old Knoxer ran away. Yes, that’s what I was hoping for.
Instead, I have an extra reminder to pray for you to have grace and strength to trust in the Lord this day. Hope in the One who does not disappoint!
Comment by Lisa (November 9, 2007 @ 8:25 am )
Thanks, Amy. Such encouraging words. I envy you your ability to focus on what is important during times like these. I’m still praying for you, too.
Hey, Greg. Just stop reading all of this. You did good by getting her in the end and look at all the blessings God has given you by having such good taste. Women can get hung up on stupid stuff–I’m pretty sure Amy would agree with this. You got it all right in the end–congratulations!!
This doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t like to hear the end of the story, though. What is better than a good birth story? A good engagement story, of course!
Comment by Another Heather (November 9, 2007 @ 8:29 am )
Amy, as a fellow pregnant sister, I so understand your pain. I will pray for this new little life to get here in God’s timing and for your comfort and peace during all of this.
Comment by Kari (November 9, 2007 @ 9:43 am )
As far as names,
did anyone ever say Jessica, Miranda or Rosabelle?
Comment by ruth (November 9, 2007 @ 12:04 pm )
this baby is making a statement from the womb. “i will not be predictable”. i am laughing with you (even if you are not laughing) because our fourth did the same thing. LATE! i had always heard that they came earlier with each pregnancy and had the same ideas that you did about this one.
i loved this post. wishing you a very safe, healthy and unpredictable newborn/delivery:0)
Comment by Heidi Jo (November 9, 2007 @ 12:18 pm )
Thanks for your honesty…hoping all goes well with the delivery!
Comment by stephanie (November 9, 2007 @ 12:35 pm )
I am thinking of you today and praying.
Maybe a funny story will help. I was pg with #5 and at the doctors for my last check up (on my due date) and I had convinced myself that he would strip my membranes and I would immediatly go in to labor and deliver within hours. HA. That’s when he told me he was going to MEXICO for the weekend and he didn’t want to examine me. I burst in to tears and my husband didn’t know what to do with me. I went home and sobbed and the children thought I was psychotic and sweet friends brought me food and then I got over it. She was 5 days late.
Big hugs to you.
You will be holding your baby very soon!!
Comment by Janet (November 9, 2007 @ 12:41 pm )
OK, the engagement story is going to seem anticlimactic now, but here it is.
He gave me the earrings for Christmas and no, it wasn’t a joke. He really thought it was a nice gift. Kelly had it right up there—they just can’t read our minds.
Greg says that he knew I was the one he’d marry on the second day that we’d met in March 1995. That same summer, he took a group of young people on a missions trip to Hong Kong and China. (I was not on that trip.) While atop of Victoria’s Peak in Hong Kong, he decided that when he returned the following year, he’d ask me to marry him there. He’d planned it out that way, and it just didn’t occur to him that sooner would be better.
So, he followed through with his plan the following year, and I said, “Yes.” He told me he loved me for the first time and asked me to marry him overlooking Hong Kong. (Here’s a pic.) He began by giving me a fortune cookie. He put the ring in there. When I tried to crack the fortune cookie, I noticed it was very stale and began to throw it over the mountain. He snatched that right up. He’d planned a speech but just offered a simple “I love you” which was enough, because it was the first time he’d said it.
He brought the fortune cookie from home, because –did you know this?—they don’t eat fortune cookies in China. It’s just an American gimmick.
It’s a beautiful story if you take out the time lapse. Greg readily admits that waiting for so long was a mistake, especially since he was certain the second day. But that’s just the way you “did things” and a better way wasn’t on the radar. We know better now and counsel others to avoid the pain and misunderstanding that I experienced as a result of “being serious” for such a long time. No, we never spoke of marriage and children the entire time leading up to our engagement, but seeing and/or talking to someone almost everyday for 16 months without knowing this would end well definitely lead to some hurt feelings on my part back then. It was a good lesson, though, and the only unfortunate part would be if we kept on going without learning from it.
Comment by THE ENGAGEMENT STORY (Amy Scott) (November 9, 2007 @ 12:49 pm )
I was wearing them when I typed out that post.
—–
Naomi, Thanks for that link on SPD. Everytime I’ve mentioned it, I get the “yes, that’s just relaxin” speech. But the info on SPD fits me perfectly. “Some women describe the feeling of their pelvis coming apart.”
EXACTLY.
Comment by Amy Scott (November 9, 2007 @ 12:58 pm )
OK, I have to admit that’s pretty good! Hong Kong and all… really really good! A year before even mentioning marriage, maybe not so good. But, I can tell he was worth the wait!
Comment by Lady Why (November 9, 2007 @ 12:59 pm )
Well, I am glad that Greg was quick and didn’t let that cookie sail down the mountainside!
Men are weird, aren’t they? Certainly DIFFERENT, anyway. My husband does not understand romance, at all. He is not a candles and flowers kind of guy. He wants to SEE what he is eating. He doesn’t plan ahead for a romantic moment, ever.
A few years back we’d been going through some rough times in our marriage. Coincidentally, I noticed that there was a tiny diamond missing from my engagement ring. I mentioned it to Rick and asked him to take it to be repaired.
I noticed it was gone from my jewelry box, so I anticipated that Rick would retrieve it from the jeweler and present it to me on a date night. I pictured it all in my mind: romantic candlelight dinner, fine wine, flowers, chocolate, down on one knee, second proposal….ahh, beautiful picture.
Of course you know it didn’t turn out that way. He brought it home and tossed it on the counter. “There’s your ring,” he announced.
I was so disappointed that I acted like a spoiled brat. HE was disappointed that I wasn’t thrilled that he had taken the time to get it fixed. It wasn’t a very pleasant evening.
The good thing (you knew I would get to it!) was that I learned more of how my husband acts. I learned that my expectations are often foolish and certainly misplaced. My hope is in God, not in my romantic fairytale endings. I now know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my steady, no-nonsense, silent type of a man loves me. I know I will likely never get flowers or candlelight, unless I plan it. But I also know that his demonstrations of love are real. His construction projects are his way of saying, “I love you.” His never criticizing me, even when I deserve it, is a gift from God. His hugs, although infrequent, mean the world to me. And I guess as far as romance goes, the proposal of marriage in the back seat of our ‘69 Chevelle will have to do. At least yours was a mountaintop experience! (GRIN!)
Praying for you,
Janet
Comment by Janet (November 9, 2007 @ 1:13 pm )
Thank you for reminding us all that putting our hope in God is something we must do every day…choose to hope in Him and not circumstances, others, or possessions. Thanks, and I HOPE the baby comes in the proper timing
Comment by Shannon (November 9, 2007 @ 1:20 pm )
Janet, I can so relate–I love a strong, silent type, too. He is a wonderful husband and a great father and he makes his love known to me in many ways, but it took me a little time to realize what they were. I have learned to be clear about what I want, keep my expectations reasonable, and my heart open. We talked about this post and he just shook his head at “all the women who want to keep their men guessing–it’s a sure road to disaster! If you live with a man for any amount of time it seems like you should be able to figure out that they just want you to tell them what you want!” Be careful not to gripe when you get it–the vacuum for Christmas, for example!
Comment by Another Heather (November 9, 2007 @ 5:54 pm )
[...] What were you expecting, gold earrings? [...]
Pingback by Amy’s Humble Musings » Baby journal: Birthday (November 14, 2007 @ 11:52 pm )
Janet said it perfectly. A few months ago my sister in law told me I am so romantic. I told her that I am not, that my husband has only given me flowers once during our many years together. What she said changed the way I viewed our marriage because it was so wonderful. She said that truly romantic people CHANGE to accommodate their spouses. She gave examples of how I have changed to make my husband feel special and that before I met him, I was into all the “fairy tale” stuff, flowers and all. As we talked about it I saw she was right. I molded myself around what my husband was like and in doing that, I was very happy and romantic in my own way.
On a side note though, for my birthday my husband came home from work (he worked the night shift) and presented me with flowers at 4 in the morning, as I was getting dressed. I burst into tears. It was such a unexpected thing for him to do and he blessed me so much. Nothing beats times like that!
Wonderful story Amy! I agree with you on the waiting to get married thing. I wrote my husband for 5 months, dated for 2 months. We broke up for 7 and then got back together. Four months after that we were married and moving down South. When he told me that he got the job down south, I said marry me or I am not going and I meant it. We have been happily married for 12 years now. Sometimes they just need a good kick in the rear to get moving. I highly suggest quick courtship. If you know they are the one then they are the one.
Comment by Christian Faith (November 16, 2007 @ 10:47 am )
Hey, Christian Faith, how’s this? We talked on the phone for a few hours on a Fri. evening, met on Saturday, decided to seriously date Sunday. We were engaged two weeks later and married four months later!! That was ten years ago and we haven’t looked back since. It gave my parents a bit of a scare though!!
Comment by Another Heather (November 16, 2007 @ 12:29 pm )
Thanks for sharing this great engagement story.
Amanda
Comment by Amanda Axelby (November 21, 2007 @ 9:49 pm )
I’m struggling with hope.
For three years I have been working hard to find a job (I have a good education and experience), and many times I have been one of the final two candidates. But each time, it ends in rejection. I have prayed for God’s will in this process the whole time, I have listened, I have waited on Him. I am broke, alienated from other Christians friends who think I must be doing something wrong, and I have been suffering some mystery illness for the past two years that I can’t even get looked at because I don’t have health insurance and I don’t want to become a “pre-existing condition.”
Does God care about these things? Does He care that I may have cancer, and each day I am without a job and health insurance I may be closer to a point of no return? I’ve been repentant and examined my life to see why He’s not taking care of my basic needs, as He promises to do. I’m not asking for a wife or a family or a home … just survival. I am confused and scared. How much can a human endure? I don’t understand what to hope for anymore.
Comment by Shawn (July 8, 2008 @ 3:31 pm )